CD's Unofficial Caption Contest #26

[Billfred]

Alright, ladies and gents, here's yet another week of all sorts of fun and dry humor and....can you tell I'm typing this after six hours of work?

Before I begin, I have to make one rather important announcement. If you haven't heard, I'm going to Kickoff. In Manchester. Which means I'm flying out Friday morning. I have no idea whether or not I'll be able to reach a computer with internet access, so the deadline is Thursday at 8:00 PM. The next contest will still be posted on Sunday, assuming I'm not snowed into Manchester.

Anyways, here are the scores...


MissInformation 74
Gary Dillard 63
T. Hoffman 62
Greencactus3 58
Dlavery 53
JVN 51
Michelle 236 45
Dorienne Plait 43
DCA Fan 41
GateRunner 38
Andy Baker 37
Greg Needel 36
Elgin Clock 35
"Big Mike" 33
EddieMcD 33
Jay H 237 32
Amanda Morrison 31
Eugenia Gabrielov 29
Bcahn836 29
Rich Wong 28
Jeff Waegelin 27
Matt Attallah 20
JosephM 20
Brandon Martus 19
Tkwetzel 19
Mike Ciance 18
Shyra1353 16
Lil' Lavery 15
Astronouth7303 14
VGMasterShadow 13
Kyle45 12
Jessica Boucher 10
Wetzel 10
Tom Schindler 10
Arefin Bari 8
DanielBCR 8
Squirrelrock 8
Aignam 7
Jack Jones 7
Vivelation 7
George1083 6
RogerR 6
ZACH P. 6
Meli W. 5
Ken Patton 4
Corey Balint 4
CourtneyB 4
David Kelly 3
Andrew Rudolph 3
Ben Lauer 3
Yan Wang 3
Barry Bonzack1604 2
Denman 2
DJ Fluck 2
Ecarlson 2
EnderofDragon 2
Jake177 2
Jeff_Rice 2
Joe Ross 2
Karinka13 2
Tom Bottiglieri 2
Tytus Gerrish 2
Aaron Lussier 1
Bill Gold 1
Coco The Monkey 1
Collin Fultz 1
DanielBCR 1
ElfMaster 1
JakeGallagher 1
Katie Reynolds 1
Lisa Perez 1
MATT_kaplan108 1
Sanddrag 1


And the picture, designed for all of us heading to Manchester to think warm...

http://www.invisiblerobot.com/robotics/robot_party_2004/index/p6126611.html

Have fun!

[Bcahn836]

Hold it right there, step away from the Krispy Kremes and no one gets hurt

[Joshua May]

I'll finally participate in one of these:

Dave, using an AMETHYST-colored water gun, holds up a local pool party for his beloved Krispy Kremes. The victim (whose face is purposely hidden) would only trade for the latest game hint, which Dave made up on the spot and thus makes no sense. ;)

[Dorienne]

*sings* Hit me with your best shot! Hit me with your best shot!!

[Kyle Love]

Dave: "What was that?"
Lady: "Your other car is in your garage!"
Dave: "That's it! Your goin' down!!!!" <squirts water gun>
Dave: "MY OTHER CAR IS ON MARS!!!!!!!!!! GET IT STRAIGHT!!!!"

[Eugenia Gabrielov]

"See! NASA Engineers get to play with really big toys. Eat this, gangsta!"

[Jay H 237]

As Dave prepared to show the proper techniques for washing vinyl siding, Heidi got caught in the line of fire "accidently", as Dave put it.

[Rich Wong]

Lady: “please listen carefully…don’t make any sudden movement, he said his “laser is loaded and is not afraid to use it.”"

Man with weapon: “Mum… mum… mum.. mum…mum…”
Lady: “He said he is a Martian and he needs to get back to his home planet.”

Man with weapon: “Mum… mum… mum.. mum…mum…”
Lady “He said he wants your money or that box of donuts you are eating…. he said it’s his fuel to get home.”

[Greg Needel]

hint of a water game this year?

[Travis Hoffman]

Dirty Dave, delivering a painfully terrible gravelly-voiced Eastwood impersonation:

"I know what you're thinking: "Did he fire six squirts, or only five?" Well, to tell you the truth, in all this excitement about hexagonal purple amethysts, 80 year-old unassisted triple plays, and the sadistic pleasure I get from watching hundreds of people make fools of themselves trying to guess the 2005 game, I've kinda lost track myself. But, being this is a .44 Super Soaker, the most powerful squirtgun in the world, and would blow your hat clean off, you've got to ask yourself one question: "Do I feel lucky?" Well, do ya, Punky Brewster?"

[VGMasterShadow]

Although paintballing is all the rage, Dave prefers to go old school.

Just don't give Dave a laser gun and mankind will live on, if you know what I mean. :D

[Melissa Nute]

Dave: "Marvin the Martian gave this to me. I wonder if the cartoons are real..."

[Aignam]

After one-too-many crazed FIRST-ers harassed him for game hints, Dave was forced to defend himself. There were no survivors.

[Bcahn836]

Dave doing his Scarface impression.

Dave,- "Say Hello to my little friend."

[Astronouth7303]

Dave doing his Scarface impression.

Dave,- "Say Hello to my little friend."

Then everyone cracked up, and Dave pulled the trigger.

Next thing anyone knew, Dave was floating in the pool, cursing that his favorite shirt ("My other car's on Mars") had gotten wet.

[GateRunner]

Lady: "Does he know the safety is on?"

[dlavery]

/me (in best Elmer Fudd voice): "...'cause it's wabbit season!"

Heidi (in best Bugs Bunny voice): "No, it's duck season!"

Cathy (in best Daffy Duck voice): "Rabbit season!"

Heidi: "Duck season!"

Cathy: "Rabbit season!"

Heidi: "Duc... no! It's ELMER SEASON!"

Me: "Uh-oh..."

[Yan Wang]

"What NASA doesn't know can't hurt them!"

[greencactus3]

oh no!!!! i forgot to submit one for #25 :eek:
gotta make up for those lost points now

whoa. did Dave just sprout another leg?....with khakis shorts on?

[VGMasterShadow]

His parents should've played it safe year and got Dave a sweater. :D

[Gary Dillard]

Preventing anyone from entering the caption contest by means of any feat of engineering is prohibited. This rule shall not apply if both the victim and Billfred are laughing after the act has been committed.:D

West Palm Beach Police arrested Gary Dillard, 44, of Wellington on charges that he hired a hit man to take out Heidi Foster (aka MissInformation) of Herndon, VA. Sources say Dillard had moved back into second place in the well known "CD Unofficial Caption Contest" behind Foster, and he contracted with NASA engineer Dave Lavery for the hit, since Dave would have also benefited from Ms. Foster's demise. Police in Herndon released this photograph of the attempted hit, which indicates that Dillard overestimated Lavery's ability to carry out the act. Caption Contest Sponsor Billfred said "if it had been succesful Dillard would have been disqualified anyway, since this would qualify as a 'feat of engineering'. If he had hired an English major like Amanda Morrison, that would have been OK."

[Steve W]

Said in a Wiazrd of Oz voice:

"I am the Mighty Dave. One false move and the Wicked Witch of the West is history"

[Rich Kressly]

"Anyone know anything about a missing plastic flamingo from NASA HQ? I should mention before you answer that tampering with federal property, even if it's weird stuff from my office, is punishable by painful delivery of ChiefDelphi negative rep points."

[Koko Ed]

You've photoshopped me for the last time, Heidi...

[MissInformation]

Okay, I've had a horrible cold and the cold medicine just may have influenced this entry. Either that or I just couldn't think of anything for this picture so I let my brain wander, a very scary thing to do, especially since once it wanders, it's hard to get it back.

It was 38 minutes past high noon and the sun beat down like, well, like a very hot sun on a very hot day. The only things roaming were cell phones, and deer and antelope refused to play. As Cathy, the schoolmarm cried on the sidelines, the two gunslingers faced each other, grit and determination showing clearly on their faces.

Dave the Kid: “I’m looking for the man who shot my Paw.”
Wild Heidi Hickock: “I shot Liberty Valance.”
Dave the Kid: “This town ain’t big enough for the both of us.”
Wild Heidi Hickock: “Then I suggest you get the heck out of Dodge.”
Dave the Kid: “I thought we were in Herndon… I mean: Are you going to pull those pistols or whistle Dixie?”
Wild Heidi Hickock: “I warn you, I’ve got the fastest guns in the West.”
Dave the Kid: “But we’re in the South.”
Wild Heidi Hickock: “Look, will you just stick to the script? Now I don’t wanna to kill you and you don’t wanna to be dead.”
Dave the Kid: “Script? You’re just stealing lines from old spaghetti westerns to create this… this monstrosity, this Ramen Noodle Western…”

It could never be determined who fired first, but the Ok Corral was never okay again.

[Squirrelrock]

What happens to Dave when he gets gis bands and lyrics missed up:

"Squirt me again, I ain't dead yet!"



-----------------------------
Come on, Dave!
We need more lyrics!
(I'll bring you fresh KK doughnuts at VCU's regional! :D )

[Bcahn836]

I guess thats what happens when you tease Dave about his Hawaiian shirts

[Squirrelrock]

What happens to Dave when he gets gis bands and lyrics missed up:

"Squirt me again, I ain't dead yet!"



-----------------------------
Come on, Dave!
We need more lyrics!
(I'll bring you fresh KK doughnuts at VCU's regional! :D )

<nonentry>I meant *HIS, not gis. oh well. </nonentry>

[DCA Fan]

Dave- Looks like I've finally got you where I want you Heidi... *evil laugh*

Heidi- NOOO!! Please! I won't touch Photoshop ever again! I promise! AHHHH!!!!

[tkwetzel]

Dave's thoughts: "I can have fun torturing her all I want and little does she know that I hired the 116 'bratlings' to toss her in the pool when I'm done with her.

[Billfred]

Well, this'll be quick as I have to start packing for Kickoff. Yes, at 1:11 AM. Yes, with a 10:40 flight out of town.

(By the way, I'm surprised. When I first saw this picture, it looked like Heidi was striking some kung-fu pose. Look at the picture again (http://www.invisiblerobot.com/robotics/robot_party_2004/index/p6126611.html), if you don't believe me.)

First place goes to...

As Dave prepared to show the proper techniques for washing vinyl siding, Heidi got caught in the line of fire "accidently", as Dave put it.
Second place...


Quote:
Originally Posted by The Heidi Foster Rule
Preventing anyone from entering the caption contest by means of any feat of engineering is prohibited. This rule shall not apply if both the victim and Billfred are laughing after the act has been committed.:D


West Palm Beach Police arrested Gary Dillard, 44, of Wellington on charges that he hired a hit man to take out Heidi Foster (aka MissInformation) of Herndon, VA. Sources say Dillard had moved back into second place in the well known "CD Unofficial Caption Contest" behind Foster, and he contracted with NASA engineer Dave Lavery for the hit, since Dave would have also benefited from Ms. Foster's demise. Police in Herndon released this photograph of the attempted hit, which indicates that Dillard overestimated Lavery's ability to carry out the act. Caption Contest Sponsor Billfred said "if it had been succesful Dillard would have been disqualified anyway, since this would qualify as a 'feat of engineering'. If he had hired an English major like Amanda Morrison, that would have been OK."
And honorable mentions...

Joshua May
Kyle45
Eugenia Gabrielov
Greg Needel
T. Hoffman
Meli W.
Aignam
GateRunner
dlavery
tkwetzel
DCA Fan
MissInformation
Koko Ed
Steve W

So, the scores until after kickoff...


MissInformation 76
Gary Dillard 68
T. Hoffman 64
Greencactus3 59
Dlavery 55
JVN 51
Michelle 236 45
Dorienne Plait 44
DCA Fan 43
Jay H 237 42
GateRunner 40
Greg Needel 38
Andy Baker 37
Elgin Clock 35
"Big Mike" 33
EddieMcD 33
Amanda Morrison 31
Eugenia Gabrielov 31
Bcahn836 30
Rich Wong 29
Jeff Waegelin 27
Tkwetzel 21
Matt Attallah 20
JosephM 20
Brandon Martus 19
Mike Ciance 18
Shyra1353 16
Lil' Lavery 15
Astronouth7303 15
VGMasterShadow 14
Kyle45 14
Jessica Boucher 10
Wetzel 10
Tom Schindler 10
Aignam 9
Squirrelrock 9
Arefin Bari 8
DanielBCR 8
Jack Jones 7
Vivelation 7
Meli W. 7
George1083 6
RogerR 6
ZACH P. 6
Ken Patton 4
Corey Balint 4
CourtneyB 4
Yan Wang 4
David Kelly 3
Andrew Rudolph 3
Ben Lauer 3
Barry Bonzack1604 2
Denman 2
DJ Fluck 2
Ecarlson 2
EnderofDragon 2
Jake177 2
Jeff_Rice 2
Joe Ross 2
Joshua May 2
Karinka13 2
Koko Ed 2
Steve W 2
Tom Bottiglieri 2
Tytus Gerrish 2
Aaron Lussier 1
Bill Gold 1
Coco The Monkey 1
Collin Fultz 1
DanielBCR 1
ElfMaster 1
JakeGallagher 1
Katie Reynolds 1
Lisa Perez 1
MATT_kaplan108 1
Sanddrag 1


Until Sunday (unless I'm snowed in...

[Jay H 237]

Wow, I'm surprised too. I didn't realize I was that funny, maybe now I can quit my day job! :p

[Bcahn836]

i still remember first caption contest (http://www.chiefdelphi.com/forums/showthread.php?p=285021#post285021) the i posted in. LOL i have come a long way.