CD's Unofficial Caption Contest #71

[Billfred]

I thought of restricting this week's contest to four-time champs.

...then I realized that I've only been doing caption contests for a year and change.

Here's the scores:

Gary Dillard 50
EddieMcD 45
T. Hoffman 44
Rich Wong 44
MissInformation 40
Nehalita 38
Jay Trzaskos 36
Al Skierkiewicz 35
Dlavery 34
Jay H 237 34
EricH 32
KathieK 30
Dorienne 007 29
Andy Baker 28
Bcahn836 27
Amanda Morrison 26
Wayne Doenges 26
Arefin Bari 26
Icurtis 24
EricS-Team180 22
“Big Mike” 20
DCA Fan 19
Xzvrw2 19
JosephM 15
Koko Ed 15
Alex Cormier 14
Kyle45 13
Mechanicalbrain 13
1derboy 13
Ashley Christine 10
Conor Ryan 9
Kjhobin 9
Goober!!! 9
Pat McCarthy 8
Squirrelrock 8
DanielBCR 7
Dave Scheck 7
Tiffany34990 7
Brandy836 6
Elgin Clock 6
JVN 6
KarenH 6
Miketwalker 6
Sciguy125 6
Greg Needel 6
Lil' Lavery 5
Artdutra04 5
Richardp 5
Jessica Boucher 4
KenWittlief 4
Kevin Kolodziej 4
RoboMom 4
Cyberguy34000 4
Denman 4
Greencactus3 4
Bill_Hancoc 4
Spears312 4
Rich Kressly 3
Ryan Foley 3
Tytus Gerrish 3
Adam Richards 2
Andrew Rudolph 2
Kyle 2
Meredith343MiM 2
Mini-D67 2
Ogre 2
RogerR 2
Eugenia Gabrielov 2
Liz C 2
Shyra1353 2
Wetzel 2
anna~marie 1
Barry Bonzack 1
Ben Lauer 1
Beth Sweet 1
Budda648 1
First degree 1
John Wanninger 1
KyleGilbert45 1
Lisa Perez 1
Matt Attallah 1
Rees2001 1
Termite233 1
Wilshire 1
InfernoX14 1


And the picture:

http://www.chiefdelphi.com/wfa/image/1079324954beatty_jpg

As always, the deadline is midnight Saturday

Go!

[Ian Curtis]

Fuzzy Dice... 5 dollars.
Segway....... 2,000 dollars.
Being seen while riding a segway with fuzzy dice with your pinky sticking out on an international forum... Priceless.

[Goober!!!]

They say old men dont have sharp rides!!! I have a sharp ride with FUZZY DICE!!! :D :D :D

[Greg Needel]

"after team 71's 4th national championship title Bill Beatty actually looses his mind and rides off on a Segway into the sunset"

[xzvrw2]

Mr. Beatty: "Now all i need is those hydraulics"

[Koko Ed]

"Hey, did you guys rememeber to plug in my Segway last night?"

[KarenH]

To have a really cool Segway, you must have fuzzy dice.

[Conor Ryan]

So I lean...here?

[Jay H 237]

While most people think that fuzzy dice on Segways riden by older people helps them relive their teenage years they in fact have a much more important function. They act as a pendulum to counter act the movement of the Segway and allow people with weaker equilibriums to stay balanced.

[greencactus3]

well ya know..... i WOULD do a burnout but this beast is AWD and yea... little too much traction..... oh a wheelie you say? i cna do that..... or wait. if i lean forwards instead of backwards.... on 2 wheels.... is that okay? no? hmm. ill do a donut! yay! :D

[Jay Trzaskos]

now how do you get the cupholder to pop out again?

[Travis Hoffman]

Consarn it! Thar ain't enuff PVC on this here contraption!

[Wayne Doenges]

#1 Entry: Unbeknownst to Bill, the students substituted the Segway batteries for the FIRST approved batteries. Now he'll only be able to ride 2 minutes and 15 seconds before he needs to recharge.

#2 Entry: Bill to self. "Please don't let me screw up like President Bush did and fall down."

[Rich Wong]

Bill, "Hey! Whooooooo borrowed my Segway last! My Chihuahua bobbleheads are missing from the wheel fenders again."

[Squirrelrock]

Old man trying to figure out how to use these new-fangled contraptions...
(this one is a little different, but he just can't seem to find the Nos button on the handle to make the thing move)

[KathieK]

When the team told Bill he'd been selected to appear on "Pimp My Ride" he expected to get a little more than this!

[Gary Dillard]

In the "Who's the hippest Beatty?" competition/fundraiser, the final results are:
Third Place: Brian
Second Place: Bill (shown here, working the crowd).
First Place: Amanda Morrison (a surprise write-in candidate).

[Al Skierkiewicz]

Bill shows off the first successful after market add-ons, fuzzy dice and a radio (only true aficionados know tuning does not require a pinky). His first attempts included moon caps ( they wouldn't stay on the wheels), fire decals (fenders were too small), lake pipes (people kept asking about why the need for two shiny kickstands.), fuzzy tail (no antenna), and (my personal favorite) an "eight ball" shift knob (what shifter?).

[Ashley Christine]

"Hey, what does this button do???"

"I wouldnt touch that if I were you!"

::crash into wall::

Maybe the reverse button should be better labled...

[Bill_Hancoc]

Upon inspecting another segway with fuzzy dice: "Ehhh... Its a nice touce but it still needs underglow, lemme show you mine" (pressing button)

[EricH]

Bill: How do I turn this thing? Ya know, back in my day, we...

[kjhobin]

"what can I say, i like to gamble!"

[artdutra04]

Is this the win button? :)

[Pat McCarthy]

Bill: Dave says that the dice make it pimp!

[Andrew Blair]

Nothing says high roller like big wheels, big dice, and a grey wind breaker.

[MissInformation]

"Woot! I'm going to meet Dean and the rest of the Segway Gang! Maybe now that I've spruced up my Segway they'll let me join their clu... aww man... what's that on my wheel? Who didn't clean up after their dog? Sheesh... I should have chosen the little pine tree air freshener instead of the dice..."

[Bcahn836]

Bill- " Ohhh what will these kids think of next?"

[Alex Cormier]

and to the left is some tea and crumpets.

[Tim Delles]

This button is new! I wonder if that is the booster they told me I was going to get?

[RoboMom]

In the "Who's the hippest Beatty?" competition/fundraiser, the final results are:
Third Place: Brian
Second Place: Bill (shown here, working the crowd).
First Place: Amanda Morrison (a surprise write-in candidate).

****not an entry******
Hey, what about meeeee!

[Gary Dillard]

****not an entry******
Hey, what about meeeee!

[/not an entry]

Sorry Miss Jenny; I should have said the hippest "Indiana" Beatty. No doubt you would win the national title hands down, although you can never count Amanda out.

[EricS-Team180]

well shoot...a sprung seat and that 12 horse Kohler I've got out back and this'd make a dandy little lawn mower racer!

[dlavery]

...and on this side I am going to put in the welded chain steering wheel, the Cadillac fins go on the back and then the flames paint job will trick it out... Maybe then they will put me in the remake of "American Graffiti"

[Kevin Kolodziej]

Mr. Bill is perplexed as to why exactly the handle isn't made of PVC. After further inspection, Bill realizes that he can incorporate this feature himself and make additional modifications as well, such as filecards for extra traction and several arms that perform various actions (hedge trimmer, weedwhacker, gutter cleaner, and leaf blower, to name a few) that all fold out from the single stand.

[nehalita]

he actually had two more fuzzy dice but he ran over them (see white on wheels) while he was examining his nails after a manicure.

[DCA Fan]

Up next on American Chopper, OCC takes a stab at pimping Beatty's ride. So far, we know the design will include fuzzy dice.

[KenWittlief]

This handle feels a little loose...... I dont know.......
Ill give you $50 for it.

[EddieMcD]

"Here me baby, hold together!"

<not an entry>Geek points if you know where that's from.</not an entry>

[Billfred]

Yes, I'm judging this thing before Sunday night. Go ahead, be shocked. I'll wait.









...okie doke. First place goes to:

"Woot! I'm going to meet Dean and the rest of the Segway Gang! Maybe now that I've spruced up my Segway they'll let me join their clu... aww man... what's that on my wheel? Who didn't clean up after their dog? Sheesh... I should have chosen the little pine tree air freshener instead of the dice..."

Second place goes to:

Is this the win button? :)

Honorable mentions go to:

1) Goober!!!
2) Greg Needel
3) Kevin Kolodziej
4) Jay Trzaskos
5) T. Hoffman
6) Wayne Doenges
7) Rich Wong
8) Conor Ryan
9) Jay H 237
10) Andrew Blair
11) Bcahn836
12) dlavery
13) Pat McCarthy
14) greencactus3
15) Al Skierkiewicz

And the burn award:

In the "Who's the hippest Beatty?" competition/fundraiser, the final results are:
Third Place: Brian
Second Place: Bill (shown here, working the crowd).
First Place: Amanda Morrison (a surprise write-in candidate).

(Not so much for Bill as for Jenny, mind you.)

Which means the scores are...

Gary Dillard 53
MissInformation 50
T. Hoffman 46
Rich Wong 46
EddieMcD 45
Nehalita 39
Jay Trzaskos 38
Al Skierkiewicz 37
Dlavery 36
Jay H 237 36
EricH 33
KathieK 31
Dorienne 007 29
Bcahn836 29
Andy Baker 28
Wayne Doenges 28
Amanda Morrison 26
Arefin Bari 26
Icurtis 25
EricS-Team180 23
“Big Mike” 20
Xzvrw2 20
DCA Fan 19
Koko Ed 16
JosephM 15
Alex Cormier 15
Kyle45 13
Mechanicalbrain 13
1derboy 13
Conor Ryan 11
Ashley Christine 11
Goober!!! 11
Artdutra04 10
Pat McCarthy 10
Kjhobin 10
Squirrelrock 9
Greg Needel 8
DanielBCR 7
Dave Scheck 7
KarenH 7
Tiffany34990 7
Brandy836 6
Elgin Clock 6
JVN 6
Kevin Kolodziej 6
Miketwalker 6
Greencactus3 6
Sciguy125 6
Lil' Lavery 5
Richardp 5
Bill_Hancoc 5
Jessica Boucher 4
KenWittlief 4
RoboMom 4
Cyberguy34000 4
Denman 4
Spears312 4
Rich Kressly 3
Ryan Foley 3
Tytus Gerrish 3
Adam Richards 2
Andrew Blair 2
Andrew Rudolph 2
Kyle 2
Meredith343MiM 2
Mini-D67 2
Ogre 2
RogerR 2
Eugenia Gabrielov 2
Liz C 2
Shyra1353 2
Wetzel 2
anna~marie 1
Barry Bonzack 1
Ben Lauer 1
Beth Sweet 1
Budda648 1
First degree 1
InfernoX14 1
John Wanninger 1
KyleGilbert45 1
Lisa Perez 1
Matt Attallah 1
Rees2001 1
Termite233 1
Tim Delles 1
Wilshire 1


An interesting statistic--Gary has yet to win a contest in this year. Five second places, eight honorable mentions, and three burn awards, but no wins. I guess being the bridesmaid isn't always such a bad thing.

Onward!