Chief Delphi - Programming jokes

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nitneylion452

22-03-2012 23:36

Programming jokes

Anyone know of any good programming jokes?

One I came up with is: Before I start writing any code, I think "what would Al Gore do?" So then I write an algorithm.

Any others? Lay em on me!

wireties

24-03-2012 00:30

Re: Programming jokes

"C makes it easy to shoot yourself in the foot. C++ makes it
harder, but when you do, it blows away your whole leg."

- Bjarne Stroustrup

Wayne Doenges

24-03-2012 08:26

Re: Programming jokes

How many programmers does it take to screw in an LED light bulb?
None, it's a hardward problem.

Taylor

25-03-2012 15:02

Re: Programming jokes

What's the programmer's #1 justification for wasting time on Chief Delphi?

"Code's Compiling."

KeatonM

26-03-2012 11:34

Re: Programming jokes

What's an FRC programmer's favorite breakfast food?

Crios.

RoboDesigners

26-03-2012 12:10

Re: Programming jokes

http://www.chiefdelphi.com/forums/sh...gramming+jokes

:)

(It's locked, but has some funny ones if you're interested...)

Jim Meyer

26-03-2012 12:21

There are 10 types of people in this world, those who understand binary and those who don't.

Phalanx

26-03-2012 12:38

Re: Programming jokes

A program is never done, until the programmer dies.

plnyyanks

26-03-2012 15:49

Re: Programming jokes

Quote:

Originally Posted by Taylor (Post 1148830)

What's the programmer's #1 justification for wasting time on Chief Delphi?

"Code's Compiling."

and I'm sure any xkcd comic fits into this thread pretty well...

mathgeek0001

28-03-2012 15:19

Re: Programming jokes

Programmer1: You know what's a good a programming joke?
Programmer2: You.

junefish

31-03-2012 19:03

Re: Programming jokes

How is a programmer like a hairdresser?

You tell them what you want, and they give you what they think you would have wanted if you knew what the heck you were talking about.

RoboDesigners

01-04-2012 17:39

Re: Programming jokes

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jim Meyer (Post 1149428)

There are 10 types of people in this world, those who understand binary and those who don't.

There are 10 types of people in this world: Those who know binary, those who don't, and those who confuse it with ternary.

All bases are base 10.

nitneylion452

01-04-2012 19:51

Re: Programming jokes

Quote:

Originally Posted by RoboDesigners (Post 1152408)

There are 10 types of people in this world: Those who know binary, those who don't, and those who confuse it with ternary.

All bases are base 10.

Could you explain this?

plnyyanks

01-04-2012 19:55

Re: Programming jokes

Quote:

Originally Posted by nitneylion452 (Post 1152504)

Could you explain this?

10 (ternary) = 3 (decimal)

LemmingBot

05-04-2012 10:18

Re: Programming jokes

Java: write once, run no where.

nitneylion452

05-04-2012 11:59

Re: Programming jokes

“Knock, knock.”
“Who’s there?”
very long pause….
“Java.”

joe5joe7

09-04-2012 19:44

Re: Programming jokes

Safety adviser: "Programmer, you need to wear safety glasses when you're working on the robot!"

Me: *waves hand* "Oh it's all right, I'm wearing safety contacts"

Nikkocharger

09-04-2012 19:48

Re: Programming jokes

Is your robot over weight....
Yes...
Well take some code out...

RoboDesigners

09-04-2012 20:16

Re: Programming jokes

Quote:

Originally Posted by nitneylion452 (Post 1152504)

Could you explain this?

Sorry... Dropped off my radar. plnyyanks basically covered it... :)

Another one I think I may have seen in someone's sig:

Code:

float getRandom(){

  return 3;

}

plnyyanks

09-04-2012 22:33

Re: Programming jokes

Quote:

Originally Posted by RoboDesigners (Post 1156010)

Another one I think I may have seen in someone's sig:

Code:

float getRandom(){

  return 3;

}

...but I thought that RFC 1149.5 specifies 4 as the standard IEEE-vetted random number.

nitneylion452

10-04-2012 01:44

Re: Programming jokes

The generation of random numbers is too important to be left to chance

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