Any good FIRST jokes?
 

I was thinking if anyone has any funny, CLEAN, FIRST Jokes... one I saw was one of those valentines day eCards that said "You come FIRST in my heart" and it had Dean Kamen on it.

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

Lunacy?

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

Lol!

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

I believe you misinterpreted the meaning of good FIRST jokes. :p

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

[At Einstein's house]

Knock knock.

Who's there.

Mecanum wheeled robot.

Einstein walks away.

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

Idk, we all played along...

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

What did the scouts say about the rookie team?

They can't be truss'ed.
(I'm a sucker for a bad pun)

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

What is the engineering mentor's favorite museum?

The museum of tolerance.

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

FIRST world problems

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

Mecanum is the most GP drivetrain in FIRST. It lets you decide where it goes.

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

I want robotics season to be over so I can finally take a break... but we're going to worlds.

FIRST Worlds problems.

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

Last week of classes is next week... but I'm attending worlds
... at least it isn't finals week like it usually is
#FIRSTWorldProblems

What drive train will the first New Zealand team have? A kiwi-bot.

Tries to ship robot out for St. Louis today. Almost doesn't make it because of snow day. < This is serious, though.

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

(Working hard on robot, calling for us to get que'd, potential scouters come)

"May we help you?"

"Ummmm Do you have any buttons? :)"

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

Mecanum's are Emily Post polite, everybody else goes first.

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

On our team is a golf club, telephone receptionist, John Calipari, and Yo-Yo Ma. They're our drive team.

I tried to play a prank on 1714, but they saw right through it.

I would do a 254 pun, but that'd be just too cheesy.

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

Game hints :p

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

............

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

Did you hear the one where 2056 lost?

No?

Me either.

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

Mecanum is so GP you let other robots drive your robot.

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

If there was ever a time to say /thread, it would be here.

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

"What time is it?" - Anybody asking the time
"Four eighty-eight" - Team Xbot's number

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

Three robots drive into a bar, the forth had a better driver.

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

From last year's game:

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

Ill take the high goal and you can take the low goal....

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

Oh, ye'll take the high goal and I'll take the low goal
and I'll be on Einstein afooooooore ye
For me and my robot will always get assists
On the bonnie, bonnie fields of St. Louis

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

All the time. I've said it to a few people outside of FIRST just because it becomes my default reaction during competition season and had to explain everything.

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

[rimshot!]

nice!

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

You win sir/madam. You win in a landslide.

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

At FTC competition:
Scout: So does your team lift?
US: Ohh ya we all lift? I think 135 Lbs is all our minimum.... Ohh and the robot lifts too.

I always got at least a smile from this!

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

(other team drivers) "yea our robot can shoot across the field, over truss, and into the high goal..." (us) "Ok so you play offense, but if you can't do it, we are taking over..." (other team) "ok"! (during match) (us) "looks like we are playing offensive".

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

This is an actual event.
I'm wearing my Robot Inspector hat and two girls come up to me.
One asks "May I ask you a question?
Me "You just did."
Girl "May I ask you another question?"
Me "You just did."

The mentor behind them is having a laughing fit.

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

OMG!!! I wish I was there to see this!!!

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

Two robots drive into a bar with a spare battery and a set of jumper cables. The bartender looks at them and says, "OK, you can stay, but just don't start anything".

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

The Canadian teams walk into a Regional… "we'll we might still win chairmans, engineering inspiration, woodie flowers, deans list, and rookie all star!"

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

Three programmers walk into Google HQ :

• The first is a French programmer who codes in Java.
• The second is a British programmer who codes in C.
• The third is a Russian programmer who codes in Labview

In order for them to understand each other, a translator is called upon to translate everything into a language all 3 can understand : profanity.

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

A member of 2642 walks over to another teams pit with a paper towel on their head. Someone asks about the paper towel and they reply. "Arrrrrr... there's a bounty on me head!"


Two robotics team members meet in an elevator and one asks the other "What team are you are on?"
The second student replies, " 20..........................................46".
The first student then asks "Why the big pause?"
And the second replies, I don't know, I guess we were born with them.


A reporter stopped three random students outside the Edward Jones dome and asks, "Are you all here for Championships?"
"I don't know," says the first student.
"I don't know," says the second student.
"Yes!" says the third one.


An infinite number of robotics students walk up to a snack bar. The first one says, "I'll have a glass of root beer." The second one says, "I'll have a half glass of root beer", the third one says, "I'll have a quarter of a glass of root beer". With that, the attendant says "cut it out you wize guys", and pours two glasses of root beer.

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

You win.

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

You should have put some MORE effort into that one. Many people could have clearly done better.

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

Come on man, be a little flexible with him.

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

Here's a new joke

Ariel assist

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

I'm replacing fence in my backyard, and I get them in lowes. When I'm walking through lowes, I have to resist yelling out "robot!" When people are in my way!

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

I made this a few months ago.

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

I didn't know… any good jokes on yours?

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

No. I didn't get any jokes at all from what I remember. So far this thread's had more success. By the way, I just meant to add to yours.

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

Here's a couple that probably stink:


I don't like broken transmissions. It just grinds my gears.

Why do some people say previous games are child's play? Because you could use Fischer Price motors.

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

Those ar pretty good

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

The robot inspector says "Sorry, but faster than light particles are not allowed on FRC Robots."
A robot with tachyon drive arrives at the robot inspection station.

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

If I've heard this joke once this season about vacuum bots during awards I've heard it 6 times.

Team XXXX has come up with a robot this year that really sucks.

If you didn't know Billfred is the king of puns. I can't even begin to describe how many we hear every day.

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

Ariel is unamused.

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

A robot using room temperature superconductors is brought over for inspection, but the inspector is not sure if superconductors are allowed.

The robot leaves without resistance.

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

The classic one:

Team sends unsuspecting freshman to Pit Admin to ask if someone has a tool. Tools for this particular joke include:
--Left-handed (any tool here)
--Metric crescent wrench
--Non-ferrous magnet
--FLUX Capacitor
--Aluminum PVC
--any random item that seems to fit (including an announcement of having just lost the game--Ooops, BTW, I just lost the game)


For this year, several people have accidentally (and truthfully) called it "Aerial Assault" due to the heavy defense.

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

One that happened this year when being inspected:
Inspector: "Do you have anything illegal on your robot?"
Team member: "Just the pot"
Luckily the inspector got the joke.

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

Our team is willing to provide a few neutrinos to any team that needs them. There is no charge.

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

This year somone on our team requested additional pylons at the Eastern Washington University District Event. A few years back someone asked for a flux capacitor and we handed them a ball of wires held together with duct tape. We then asked for an angle trisector and received four pieces of plywood held together with a bolt.

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

FIRST of all, do puns count? If they do then I'll ASSIST the thread with some puns I TRUSS that you all will CATCH on to them Else I'll make a programming joke within;

OK down to some moderately cheesy jokes:

What do you call a tie match that will be decided on who makes the truss?
A TOSS UP

Wanna hear a joke about assisting?
I'll pass

First never really took off until Dean Kamen

Wanna hear a joke about motors?
as long as its CIM-ple

pshhhhhhhhhhhhhh pneumatics

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

PIT ADMIN: Team xxxx is in need of a pneumatic programming wrench.
My team just started laughing.

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

Another one:

(Billy Joel) Its always been a matter of truss!

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

Lunacy was awesome!

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

LOL

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

Can't tell if being serious... Or if this is supposed to be a joke... :ahh:

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

Team 840 receives an unexpected award at a competition.
They do not react.

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

LOL,
Even more:
-- Keys to the robot
-- 6 feet of goal line
-- The can of Jaguar fluid
-- Lexiglass (that's for you Emily)

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

There are many other threads for stuff like this: http://www.chiefdelphi.com/forums/sh...ad.php?t=84696

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

don't forget when one tips over and the other gets deactivated but we only lose by 21

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

two robots drive into a bar. the other had a good driver

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

Umm...

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

Four robots drive into a bar, the fifth had the best driver.

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

And to finish it off ... five robots drive into a bar, the sixth one actually had a driver.

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

3 Robots drove into the bar, the last one was shorter than 14" and went under it.

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

Five robots drive into a bar... none are chose for eliminations

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

Truss me, we can catch!

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

A robot walks into a bar, and orders a drink.
the bartender says, "Hey, we don't serve robots."
And the robot says, "Not yet, but someday you will."


Q: "What does your robot do?
A: "It collects data about the surrounding environment, then discards it and drives into walls"


By the way, what exactly did you mean when you said "Robot Jokes?" For example, could you have meant this?
http://www.ted.com/talks/heather_kni...omedy#t-167036

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

...and then proceeded to Attack the nearest Stack.






4 robots drove into a bar. They ended up stuck off the floor.

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

The fifth climbs higher, and the sixth keeps shooting cycles.

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

How about when you ask Dean for an autograph at the NYC regional and he screams NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! Then he's just like JK LOL.:)

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

Yeah... At NYC I asked Dean kamen for an autograph... serious face and all he yells "NO!" and a few seconds later he was like "ok" and took my drivers pin and commented on Libby Kamens autograph saying "Hmm i wonder who this is" Lol...

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

that was hilarious

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

How about the fact that I just got an NI Parkway request when we're not in the finals and I didn't sign up for it.

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

I saw this somewhere


"this is what happens when you let mechanical engineers deign a game!"

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

FIRST pickup lines from this video

"Dang girl did the Cheesy Poofs build you, cuz you look perfect"
"The way you talk to those judges, you're my Engineering Inspiration"
"On a scale from 1 to 10, I'd rate you a 67"
"Like one of Dean Kamen's speeches, we could go all night long... making robots (what else would we do?)"
"I've been scouting you out, and I think we'd make great alliance partners"

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

Not everyone wins a regional... if your against a Canadian team, good luck!

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

Does it mean I'm addicted if I have the urge to yell Robot in the middle of a crowded hallway?

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

Why was the robot angry?
Because someone kept pushing his buttons

Where does a robot go on holiday?
Wireland

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

And then the autonomous period ends. And the sixth robot still doesn't do anything because it was programming's fault. :D

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

Something mechanical breaks "(programmers name) FIX THE CODE!"

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

"How often do you have safety meetings?"
*blank stare*

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

I strongly believe the GDC was encouraged by Miley Cyrus for this years game…

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

Well, since I haven't seen this anywhere else - sending one of the freshmen to find a 'wireless cable'...
We had one guy searching for 40 minutes, before someone took pity on him.

Also, as said by CAD teams everywhere, 'We'll be done by the end of the week'

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

Its not if kids or interested in the program, its if they can handle all the crazy kids in the program

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

Water game

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BV8thPqCkQ4



This video is pretty funny

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

Do pickup lines count? I've got one!

Are you a gracious team with a highly ranked robot?
Because I'd pick you ;)

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

How many programmers does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
None - that's a hardware problem!

Also:
Pessimists see the glass as half empty.
Optimists see the glass as half full.
But engineers know that the glass is 2x larger than it needs to be.

The creativity award is sponsored by Xerox.
Xerox makes copiers

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

Look into the history of Xerox. Specifically PARC. You'll understand why it's fitting.

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

Be wary of dyslexic robots. They usually have at least one bad trap.

Several fonts walk into the snack bar at Championships. The server says "Get out of here, We don't serve your type here."

Did you hear about the new e-reader? Reader’s Digest and 
Amazon created software that will condense books when you download them. It’s called the Dwindle.

A judge walks into a teams pit area and asks a student what technology has done for them. The student answers, "Technology has certainly simplified and shortened my life."

Re: Any good FIRST jokes?
 

Robotics kids can party… when its like 11:30 at night, and there's music involved, we start becoming crazy