Some computers, such as the Classmate, have autodetecting hardware, so you can use a straight-through cable on them (we use the Classmate to image, and Linux machines to program).
To connect straight to the cRIO, you either need a crossover or an autodetecting port. If in question, use a crossover. Hopefully you have one lying around (you can hold both ends in the exact same orientation side-by-side. Iff the order of the colors (some wires are striped) match, it's a straight-through. If they are scrambled (some will still be right), then it's a crossover. If none of them match, you're doing it wrong
)
Have you imaged the cRIO yet? (If no-one on your team knows, then you haven't).
What do you mean when you say that NetBeans "freezes"?
I hope this helps.