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Originally Posted by EricH
That is true. However, I ask you this: What evidence do you have that there are no issues?
I remind you that most places have laws/rules/regulations/policies against the behavior that is described--if someone goes to the appropriate party and says "Hey, such-and-such is happening", then the appropriate party is required to investigate and take appropriate action--which may in fact be "we have no evidence", or it may be more severe. (And it's entirely possible that the action taken isn't appropriate at all but that's a debate for another time.)
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I agree I don't have evidence to cause me to act.
I also can't guarantee that there's nothing wrong there.
However as you say there are rules - often rules well displayed for detecting and addressing negative behavior like this.
So the questions that beg to be asked then are:
1. Do they not know about these rules?
Perhaps that is an issue FIRST should consider on a larger scale because it will be lost in the flow of this topic.
2. Does the school not publish these rules? As you say many are local law and require publication and in some cases even interactive education. So why take the grievance here instead of down that path?
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Are you assuming that that ("feeling appreciated") is the issue? I don't get that anywhere in the initial post. That "hijacking" as you put it is clearly a sign that either someone doesn't understand the decision structure, or someone else has chosen to ignore the decision structure. Pick one.
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It's certainly not the entire issue but I take away from it that it's there.
Generally grievances like this are rarely just this one aspect but add this to the great big kettle and stir and sooner or later the mixture can be volatile.
Someone gets bullied and sooner or later it starts attacking their self-worth.
The thing is that you can tread near being a bully, and to a person that is often more seriously bullied it can be a serious blow and their reaction could have reasons but be misdirected.