Quote:
Originally Posted by AmiableVariable
Putting aside the fact that the focus of the thread is how to make STEM more welcoming for *women*, not for those with an contextually inappropriate sense of what is creepy: I have yet to see anyone advocate outright castigation. Most of the suggestions have been preemptive education of social expectations, or bluntly pointing out the offense. Will this elicit embarrassment for the offender? Of course it will, regardless of how it is presented- they did something wrong and are being called out for it. It is natural to learn from these things, and intent does nothing to change the outcomes of these actions. This is very different from screaming and yelling at the poor innocent youth who unknowingly crossed some small line.
Again, in the context of this conversation, there does not need to be equal representation of both sides. The OP asked how widespread these issues were, and how to help. All of these stories and anecdotes illustrate what we think the problem is, and what would help us. Just because you have not personally had these experiences does not make them misrepresentation: they are all very relevant to the conversation.
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That is the problem isn't it? Very rarely do we intend to castigate somebody, and yet, we can overreact. I've done it. Chances are you've done it. We've all done it. What I've tried to explain is that some people have been equivocating harassment with simply being awkward.
Not everyone ITT, but some. Those are who I was addressing when saying that we should be careful when embarrassing people, particularly the young who are susceptible to self-esteem issues.
I never said peoples' experiences were invalid, I was saying that it is not perfect. When you represent both sides, you determine how widespread an issue is. The nature of the issue changes depending on perspective. Perspective is crucial.