[IlluminEllen]

It is time we drop our opinions, nit-picky definitions, and personal experiences which distract from the problem that is at hand: Women often don't feel comfortable/safe within STEM. If you are not a women in STEM, your opinion on the environment of STEM for women is secondhand. What you think is comfortable/uncomfortable is not relevant to those who are affected. The point of this post is to help better STEM's environment for women. So, I think it's time to refocus on discussing specific solutions.

As I see it, the best place to start culture change is individuals getting actively involved. If you see something that looks uncomfortable, intervene. If someone comes to you and tells you they are uncomfortable or being harassed, intervene. If you aren't sure, intervene. You don't have to make every situation into a serial creep and a terrified victim. Simply point out that the situation looks uncomfortable and help figure out where that discomfort is coming from.

Sometimes all that is necessary is the discomfort to be called out. If this attention doesn't resolve the situation, then you can have a conversation. If the conversation doesn't work, then maybe you need to create a consequence.

Awkward flirting may not be harassment, but it is still uncomfortable, and this discomfort is what the problem is. These instances of discomfort discourage females from wanting to continue to be in STEM. We NEED to call attention these situations to make any progress. No two situations are going to be the same so no two solutions are going to be the same. There is no step by step guide on how to help. If there was, this thread wouldn't exist. Start by doing what you feel is right and intervene when you feel it is necessary. This means intervening even when it seems awkward and uncomfortable for you to do so. The more you do it, and the more comfortable you will become. The more comfortable you become, the better of a position you will be in to fight for this culture change at a higher level.

In conclusion, one of the many solutions to this problem is you. It is every one of you that cared enough to open this thread and read to this point. In order to solve this problem we all need to get out there, start intervening, and become the change we desire.