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In an effort to save as many of my gender as possible from emotional distress, painful rejection, and potential lawsuits, I would like to offer the attached list of pick up lines that absolutely do not work. This list has been complied after a long, careful, and detailed research effort. This involved close observation of the interactions between members of robot teams over several years, an examination of multi-cultural courting rituals, and the occasional consumption of blue-bottle fruit flies. I completely deny having personally used any of these lines (at least, not since I got married):
- Want to know about the last time I had a sucking chest wound?
- In many third-world countries you would be considered quite beautiful!
- Wow! My grandmother has a dress just like that!
- Wanna help me light some farts? Hey! I'm a guy! It's what we do!
- Want to come over for dinner? I have this great recipe from Hannibal Lechter.
- Want to come up and see my itchings? Uh, I mean, etchings. Er, now that I think about it...
- Want to go for a ride on my tricked out Zamboni?
- Wanna come and watch my bris?
- We have got to go shopping! You need serious help!
- Once, I saved all my naval lint for a whole month. Then I sorted it by colors. Did you know that there are 17 distinct shades of lavender?
- Do you think I should get this lanced?
- I cook via smoke alarm.
- It's OK. The statute of limitations has run out on most of that stuff...
- I'm on a FIRST team! Can I tell you about my bot?
-dave
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"640K ought to be enough for anybody."
- Bill Gates
Last edited by dlavery : 16-04-2002 at 01:20.
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