[dhitchco]

Aaaah,
finally a team problem that has nothing to do with the robot itself. As Dean and Woodie have always said, "FIRST isn't about the robot".

It is all about teamwork, cooperative competition, and win-win situations. In any real-world corporate experience, it's perfectly OK to "agree to disagree", but a) don't make it a personal thing and b) don't let the disagreement interfere with the overall effort of the team as a whole.

In your case, you have quite a few options:
a) The entire team can quit and walk away. But that wouldn't make you happy either.
b) When your team merged-in with the other two schools, which school's "rules" is the collective team now living under? If it is the other school's rules that your team now has to obey/follow, well then it was your decision to abide by those rules when you merged.
c) Does "zero tolerance" really work? Do you really understand why these rules are in place? Was there some incident in prior years that created the rules? I'd think that a sincere conversation with the mentor(s) would create a clearer path to a "win-win" relationship.

I think that your comment about "not being allowed to sit next to each other at the Pittsburgh regional" is a bit extreme, but also ask yourself if sitting as "couples" might also detract from the true team camaraderie and spirit. Every day you are exposed to somebody and something new, so you can always learn by "mixing it up".

BUT.....you are representing your school as well as your sponsor, so behavior MUST err on the side of being very proper & well-behaved.

***Lastly, be clear to differentiate between the mentors and the chaperones. For many legal reasons, your sponsoring mentors may NOT be allowed to play judge & jury over the kinds of issues you are making them decide upon. Instead, the parents/chaperones MUST be the ones to set the school club rules......

Good luck.....now go and focus together on getting your robot to win!