View Single Post
  #8   Spotlight this post!  
Unread 16-06-2008, 15:56
AdamHeard's Avatar
AdamHeard AdamHeard is offline
Lead Mentor
FRC #0973 (Greybots)
Team Role: Mentor
 
Join Date: Oct 2004
Rookie Year: 2004
Location: Atascadero
Posts: 5,494
AdamHeard has a reputation beyond reputeAdamHeard has a reputation beyond reputeAdamHeard has a reputation beyond reputeAdamHeard has a reputation beyond reputeAdamHeard has a reputation beyond reputeAdamHeard has a reputation beyond reputeAdamHeard has a reputation beyond reputeAdamHeard has a reputation beyond reputeAdamHeard has a reputation beyond reputeAdamHeard has a reputation beyond reputeAdamHeard has a reputation beyond repute
Send a message via AIM to AdamHeard
Re: Farewell, Chief Delphi.

Quote:
Originally Posted by JVN View Post
I'm confused by all the "Don't change" posts in this thread.
Maybe "change" is exactly what is called for in this situation. Either self-change, or a change of scenery.

You either need to:
-Learn to deal with the conflicts you're in.
-Change to avoid the conflicts.
-Move on to somewhere where the way you are will cause less conflict.

Either way, some sort of change is important. Craig has seemingly chosen the 3rd option.

Social interactions sometimes result in conflict. Some of these are positive conflicts, some of them are negative conflicts. "I'm sick of fighting with people so I'm leaving" is not a constructive solution; it is just a way of playing a martyr.

It is possible that none of this is your fault. If that is the case, then great... move on. The rest of us will shrug, and life will go on.

A wise man once told me: "If you continually find yourself in negative conflict with people, they probably aren't the problem, you are; it is probably a good idea to change the way you approach your social interactions & the way you communicate."

Something you are doing is causing these conflicts and maybe some self reflection could help you understand why. This is an opportunity for self-improvement.

I don't believe "beliefs" are usually the problem. It is rare that someone makes enemies of enlightened people because of their beliefs. Most of us are capable of "live and let live" philosophies. Disagreements happen, but they are often very constructive. Negative conflict (in my experience) stems primarily from problems of communication.

You don't necessarily need to change your beliefs for the benefit of others, but perhaps you can change the way you express them.

If you find that you can't fit into the community, and you won't change to fit, then maybe leaving is the correct solution. Maybe you will find some place where you do fit in.

Good Luck with whatever you're doing.

-John

PS - A farewell POST is just a cry for attention; not a farewell.
You don't want to leave, and I bet you're probably reading this right now.

What sort of attention do you want? If you'd like to message me I'll be happy to talk things over with you.
Awesome Post. Really, everyone should read it entirely.
Reply With Quote