Posted by Anton Abaya at 02/24/2001 2:54 AM EST
Coach on team #419, Rambots, from UMass Boston / BC High and NONE AT THE MOMENT!
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In Reply to: Dedicated few...
Posted by nick237 on 02/23/2001 6:59 PM EST:
I figured I might as well share my difficult moments as well....
Like you Nick, I was in charge of recruiting people to work with us on the bot. In the beginning, we had tons of people, commitments here, commitments there. There were commitments with money, there were commitments with time, there were commitments everywhere. Funny thing is, a lot of them just sorta disappear during crunch time and that's when I have to go out of my way to either find someone else to take over the job, or have to do it myself on top of all the other things already. This year I stressed with all the people making commitments that if they plan to break their commitment, i dont care as long as they tell me well in advance so that i can take over if need be and pick up the slack, but really, when does that ever happen.
To tell you the truth, although last year was a success for the team, I had to struggle and sacrifice to make it happen (money, grades, life, hair color?). I always tell myself that doing FIRST (starting a team straight out of high school, which meant finding support) was my greatest accomplishment (giving back to H.S. students what I got when I was one), and was also my biggest mistake (let my life suffer). Rambots is a love hate relationship to me. Sometimes I'm in love with it, sometimes I wish it would just disappear into nothiness as it burns me out like hell.
This year, I almost DID not do it. Luckily enough a FIRST veteran joined our team and that sorta brought my hopes up. I figured it would ease the stress a little as I would have more help. Apparently, it was a commitment that I also lost in the long run, which I regret but had to cope. Lost of losses, but in the end, I guess I have to finish the job.
I told myself this was my last year unless someone wanted to take some of my hats. I dont want to be "leader" any longer really unless I have more resources. It's hard to build an empire if you only have a village (somehow, i did it). But maintaining that empire of a village is just a bigger headache and I'd like a few governors to help me if you know what I mean. So unless I get more "active" members who arent independent and willing to take big responsibilities, I think I have contributed enough. I cant let Rambots die, I worked so hard to get this far with it. (which is why when some team members slack off and hint at not doing it anymore or something like that, it hurts inside).
Maybe this year is my last year......that is, as a team "leader." I miss just being the h.s. student. I miss being the one that learns and listens. I miss being the one who need not take full responsibility for everything. But most of all, I miss just being a 19 year old.
I know a lot of other FIRST team leaders who are burnt out and say this is their last year. Though somehow they are attracted to it after christmas.... (maybe it's the food). But either way, whatever happens, we have done our jobs and we have given to the community, to the high school students, and ultimately to ourselves.
Good Luck in the years to come, all you team leaders our there. We are what makes FIRST a success. We are at the core of our team's greatness. Let us be proud of the work we have all accomplished. Great job!
-anton abaya
Rambots, #419
ps. feel free to email me some replies.