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/Me slides up alongside the Bacon in a rusty canned ham barge. There is a mysterious object bulging under a tarp.
The professor has just released his lates invention to us, and not a minute too soon.
/me yanks the tarp back with a flourish.
Gentlemen! I give you professoer shake'n Bake's....TENDERIZER!
We need a skilled pilot to fly this thing into the enemy's bowels.
Are there any volunteers?
__________________
Charter member and self proclaimed president of the "League of Travel-sized Women". 
Opera Company, SUU.
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