Bad Jokes For Build Season

[JohnBoucher]

OK... Build season is about half over and it's getting a little tense. What we need is a little bad humor. I'll start....

Two hydrogen atoms walk into a bar. One says, "I've lost my electron."
The other says, "Are you sure?" The first replies, "Yes, I'm positive..."

Anyone else???

[Swan217]

Three robots drive into a bar.
The fourth one had better drivers.

::rimshot:: ::crickets::

It was a lot funnier in 2001.

[Billfred]

You should come to a 1293 meeting sometime. Three of us (one student, one engineer, and myself) are all going straight to the ninth circle of pun hell. Example:

Me (to one of our engineering-type folk): Are we having fun yet?
Mr. Hosford (in a bad Russian accent): Do you know Russian?
Me: Not really.
Hosford: Do you know the word for "no" in Russian?
Me: Nyet.
Hosford: So you see? Are we having fun, nyet. The answer is right there in the sentence.

It only gets worse. I'll post some of the good ones Saturday.

[Dorienne]

This just happened about 2 minutes ago between about 5 people on our team. Joe, Joey, Dan, Brandi and Chuck. I'm sitting here and Joey's talking to me, and here's the conversation:
Chuck: Joe!
Joey: (turns around, sees Chuck looking at Joe) Goddarnit Joe get out of here, I'm sick and tired of having this happen!
Brandi, Chuck, Dan: Joe, hey Joe we need you, Joooooe...Joe!
Joey: I hate you people.

Not really a joke, but it's classic stuff. It's funny listening to it considering our teammates. =D I'll post more if I get anything.

[JulieB]

here a joke that know one understands on CHIEF DELPHI

Lets call FIRST and request that they lower the goals down about a foot or so?

http://www.chiefdelphi.com/forums/showthread.php?t=33459

[kpugh]

An ASCII character walks into a bar and orders a double.
"Having a bad day?" asks the barman.
"Yeah, I have a parity error" replies the ASCII character.
The barman says "I thought you looked a bit off."

I think Andy Baker was the first person I heard this one from.

A neutron walks into a bar and orders a drink. After he finishes he asks the bartender how much. The bartender says "For you buddy, no charge!"

*rimshot*

[Kyle Love]

Here's another Baker joke...

Andy:"Kyle you want a chip?"
Me:"sure"
Andy:"Too bad 'cuz its nots-yo-cheese!"

[Mr. Ivey]

Last year, when Crebber was welding in the paint booth room at school, he caught a filter for the exaust fan on fire. Well the next thing I hear as I'm standing in the next room is FIRE FIRE FIRE! I think on my feet, grab an extinguisher, our coach, Mr. Clarke grabs it, runs back in and extinguishes the flame. This is not the funny part. Our coach this year, Mr. Turner, later talkes to Woody about things after he came in to inspect the damage, right after the fire. Dispalying his take charge attitude, we loveingly gave him the nickname "Fire Marshall Turner". The pun is that his first name is Marshall, and he doesn't like the nickname very much.
ivey

[Wayne Doenges]

Here's one that will make you think.

If the chips are down, the cows are eating pillows

If you want to experience what others are feeling, walk a mile in their shoes. By the time they figure out you have stolen their shoes, you will be a mile away and they will be bare footed

If at first you don't succeed, so much for sky diving.

Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get hit by airplanes

Wayne Doenges
CAD Mentor

[Alaina]

My team keeps a quotebook from build season. They might not seem funny to everybody but it's more of a momento of the season.
"I get yelled at when I touch things."
and
"I don't know where I am, but I see a panda."

[Billfred]

Alright, I've got a good one for all of you who experienced the Bosch drill motors.

Last year, our driver was working on our robot along with a few other people. We had just cast off the CIMs, as they were about to destroy the innards of our robot. So we decided to try the drill motors, which naturally didn't seem to hold too well.

Finally, he thinks he's got it, so he holds it triumphantly and says "I think this'll work."

Moments later, the motor had slid backwards onto the floor, along with almost all of the gears in the transmission.

...and they wonder why we went to window motors...