The Reasons we Continue to be in FIRST

[galewind]

As a new father, I have honestly been toying with the idea of leaving FIRST, if only temporarily, so that I can focus more time on my family. It has been emotionally draining, me not being able to see our son for a four-day stretch, and even more challenging for my wife to handle him with little to no help. I know I am missing pivotal moments in his development, and I long for the chance to just be with him.

I am the only faculty member involved in our FIRST program, and thus, I am required to be at whatever events the team wants to participate in that are "school-sponsored" activities.

I have given my students a half-hearted ultimatum that if they value this program, that it be their charge to find additional help for me amongst the school faculty that can alleviate part of my burden so that I can spend time with my family. So far, I have yet to hear anything of their efforts, and it saddens me to think that I may have to let go.

Now, I say that my ultimatum is half-hearted, because I know the value of this program, and I have witnessed the benefits that the students receive. I don't think I am able to walk away from this team, but I cannot continue to work in this capacity for much longer. It would be irresponsible to my family and to my team (because my heart wouldn't really be into it as I would be constantly missing my family). But for now, I am still here...and I know that my situation is not unique.

So the question becomes -- why did I post it in this thread? And the answer leads us back to the original question -- "Why do we continue to participate in FIRST?"

I am a teacher. I see my job as a facilitator of independent learning, meaning it is my job to make you think, and to help you learn HOW to learn.
FIRST does this and more. It removes creative boundaries, and removes standardized scoring rubrics. It expands the capacity of an individual to think outside of the box. It promotes teamwork, and allows students to develop their own projects in which they work with their peers. It allows you to appreciate the accomplishments of others without jealousy, but with admiration. I could continue this paragraph for another 20 lines, but the jist of it is -- Once you are exposed to FIRST, it is hard to turn your back on it, because you know that your students are benefitting in more ways than any other program could ever offer.

So for me, considering leaving FIRST has been the most heart-wrenching and draining situation I've ever had to deal with. I've spent 10 years of my life helping to build a program that I'm exceptionally proud of, but I cannot continue to work in this capacity alone. I hope that we have the chance to continue our team in the future, and inspire another teacher (or two or three!) to become integrated into our fold.

Sorry for venting, but it's been one of these huge "on-my-minds" that I wanted to get out verbally for a while.