A Little Mentor Problem

[treffk]

Originally Posted by Monochron

Just to add a quick bit from mentor perspective, occasionally in dealings with other professionals / administrators there are bits of information that won't (I might say shouldn't) be communicated to students.

Chief among these is usually financial information. If a meeting is going to be held and certain financial topics are going to be discussed, the other party may not want students present. It is usually the FIRST way to include the students in every aspect of the team, and conversely it is often the "professional world" way to bar students from some things. It doesn't sound like all of your issues are because of something like this, but a portion of it (especially the meeting with principles part) could be coming from that.

Alternatively the other parties could have a . . . prejudice against including students in "upper level" talks. Most people in FIRST disagree with this (as do I) but your mentor may be excluding you in order to help the team.

Again, it sounds like you have some other issues that everyone else is answering, I just thought I would give some alternate opinions.

This is right on the money. Similar to your stubborn former Head Coach there are stubborn Administrators in schools. Depending on the environment there or what mentors feel the environment is will determine if students should be present. Mentors and Coaches do not want to make those unfamiliar with the culture of FIRST uncomfortable as this could be a negative and make them decide not to participate/help.

I just want to mention I am a firm believer students are able to do anything and came from a team/school that thought that as well. As students we were given free reign to go find sponsors without adults present. We were given cash from a mentor and sent to the store to purchase items alone. On a monthly basis, excluding my freshman year, I would ask our secretary for a print out of our teams account through the school. Heck, I even filled out reimbursement paperwork and submitted it to the school, as a student, so adults could get money back for supplies/tools they purchased.

[JamesCH95]

Speaking as a head coach - I do not go out of my way to shoulder extra responsibility, especially if it means taking work away from enthusiastic students.

I think that there must be a good reason why your mentor is doing what they are doing. They stepped down as head mentor, but are now trying to do more work? That is a big non-sequitur.

It does sound like your biggest issue is communication - have a frank conversation with this coach. Ask them 'why' they are doing what they are doing. DO NOT 'have a conversation with yourself.' That is to say, don't try to imagine or assume someone else's intentions, reasoning, etc. This almost always leads to overreactions and unneeded stress.

[qnetjoe]

It sounds like there is a lot more going on than you see and/or realize. Just remember that these are the biggest tests of your character and by the sounds of it you are doing a good job!

Every mentor will tell you transitions are part of life. One thing that has helped me over the years is to remember that each side is doing what they see as "the right thing to do". However irrational it may seem. Just continue to be appreciative of the time they spend mentoring you and your team.

Having been part of teams that have had similar issues, make sure that you and teammates take a few seconds and tell your mentors thank you for everything they do. This helps remind people why they are there (you the students and not the robot).

I really recommend that you sit down with the new and former head mentors, at the same time, and ask "What can I do to best help the team?" The answer may surprise you.

[cameron.lynn]

Thank y'all all so much for the advice and different perspectives. I'll definitely be using some of it this week to solve this, and I'll be keeping all of the different views and possible reasons in mind.