Making STEM a better place for women

[ATannahill]

Originally Posted by Alan Anderson

Hugging someone who does not want to be hugged should not be a "comfortable" action. The hugger in that case is not in the right. The huggee is not responsible for respecting the hugger's preference to give the hug.



What you are saying sounds disturbingly close to the idea that rejecting an advance can be considered an attack. I'm sure you don't think that's how you said it, but as a hug-averse person myself, I have had to threaten more than one team mascot with an official complaint when they refuse to accept that I do not want to be touched, much less hugged. The all-too-common reaction is to accuse me of being mean to them.

I mistakenly put the wrong word in my post and I have changed it. The person wanting to give people hugs should be comfortable in wanting to give hugs, as the person wanting to avoid physical contact should be comfortable in turning down a hug. The potential hugger is responsible for respecting the other person's objection to the hug, as the huggee is responsible for respecting the hugger's preference to give hugs to others, even if they do not participate themselves.