True things heard at college.

[Cory]

"If you come back to the dorms trashed, definitely DO NOT STICK YOUR FRIGGIN HEAD THROUGH MY WALL AND THEN GO INTO THE SHOWER WITH YOUR HEAD BLEEDING EVERYWHERE AND TELL ME YOU DIDNT DO IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Those are the exact words of my RA. Apparently that happened to him last year

[Ryan Albright]

Originally Posted by Greg Needel

lol...it is more fun to get out of bed and chace them down.

WE had some kids at my complex running around beating on doors and we chased them down it was great times.

I have been at college for about a week and 3 days and some of the stuff i hear is really funny. I went to a private school all my life so teachers werent as blunt as they are in college. I lvoe college tho, and for the upcoming college kids, its def the greatest time of your life, yuou will never miss high school

[gsensel]

I just heard this one in my anatomy lab.
"You cut it's head off, LET ME SEE IT!"

[ChrisH]

Originally Posted by gsensel

I just heard this one in my anatomy lab.
"You cut it's head off, LET ME SEE IT!"

OK story time.

Many many moons ago, way back in my freshman year, I lived in a place called Middle Earth, in a dorm called Lorien. Lorien was known as the "dead dorm" for two reasons. One because we didn't party that much, at least not with other dorms. The other was because of a dorm tradition. Every year the dorm put on a Haunted House as close as possible to Halloween.

That year we did a particularly bloody version. The father of one of the guys in the dorm worked in a slaughter house. So he somehow obtained the head of a cow from which the skin had been removed. This was placed on a table for one of the scenes in the haunted house. It just happened to be right off the main entrance in the living room.

I was sitting in the living room reading the paper when a couple of upper classmen (who happened to be female) walked in. Instead of the usual "Oh Gross" comment the first one said "Dibs on the eye!" the other one said "I get the other one". They were really excited about it.

Did I mention they were Bio majors? They wanted to disect the eyes. They did too. I'm not sure what happened to the rest of it when we were done. I'm not sure I really want to know.

[Billfred]

Ah, yes...I found another today. I'm in music appreciation, and we're covering the renaissance. The professor talks about how composers, at the Catholic Church's request, simplified the vocals so that listeners could understand the words. One person asked why it wouldn't be the problem of the people to know the words. True exchange, I swear:

Professor: What if you've been going to church your whole life and couldn't understand the words?
Student: Then you're going straight to hell.

Who knew that those hundred-people classes could be so interesting?

(and a word for you high school students: I currently take five classes. One has a hundred people. One has a smidge less than that. My speech class is around 20 for the actual speaking and practice and such, but for lectures a few other sections sit in and the auditorium fills to about 100. My remaining classes all hover around 20. So it isn't too bad.)

[Mike AA]

Originally Posted by dlavery

Actual, real quote heard while in college:

"You know, if we shoot the flame thrower out of the back of the car while driving down Main Street at 2:00am, we are probably going to get in a lot of trouble..."
"Only if they catch us - and who is going to chase a car with 20-foot flames coming out the back!"

Does a waterballoon sling shot count going down the campus road? And yes, we DID launch them at people even though it said dont

Originally Posted by ChrisH

That year we did a particularly bloody version. The father of one of the guys in the dorm worked in a slaughter house. So he somehow obtained the head of a cow from which the skin had been removed. This was placed on a table for one of the scenes in the haunted house. It just happened to be right off the main entrance in the living room.
.

thats awesome.

I didn't live in the dorms (commuted, it was much cheaper and I could still keep my job) but I often visited many of my friends' dorms. One evening, when I locked my keys in my car or lost them, don't remember which, I was walking back to one person's dorm and over heard some people talking as they ran past me to the bridge ( I went/ will go back in spring to GVSU in Allendale, Mi). They then screamed and I heard a large crash and a bunch of yelling, I didn't notice the computer monitor they were carrying on the way which I saw in the morning. I thought someone had died.

[evulish]

Heh. Not many college quotes can be repeated on these forums, at least for me. Not even the ones said by professors Dorm life is pretty neat (I was off-campus last year). My roommate (and friend before that) is a musician with a bunch of recording tools (I figure we have probably just $1000 worth of audio hardware alone in the room.. and enough total electronics in our dorm to cover tuition for one of us). Anyways, there were three guys jamming on acoustic guitars and a vocalist. Good times.

http://www.mehh.net/dorm/MVI_0290.AVI if anyone really cares. The mics obviously pick up MUCH better sound than my digital camera 5 guys, 2 computers, and amp in a dorm makes it really warm.

We've already had 2 sound violations and it's only been 4 days (At midnight, noises stop.. except for the acoustic guitars in our dorm)

[Ashley Weed]

Wow, I'm so glad to finally have internet again ... a whole week without any service. I live in an totally unaffilitiated apartment complex that houses college students. Wow, some of the stories I could tell.

One of the dumbest things I've ever done in a convo with one of my apt. mates:
{while watching the Country Music Awards}
Kristi: "Wow, some of these dudes are mighty fine."
Ashley: "Hey! Let's drop out of high school and become roadies!!!"
Kristi: "Dude, were in college?"

[Joshua May]

As a way to ease my way back into the Chiefdelphi community after a way too long vacation, i thought I might bring back this thread with some new quotes from the Class of 2009. I'm already keeping a quotebook full of the funniest things that we hear, so far we have 100 quotes 2 months into the school year. Most of these quotes cannot be repeated on the forums, but here are some of my favorites:

"What?!? I will cut you!!" - Me, a normally quiet person, to the refs at the last football game, where the refs were, of course, biased.

"We don't have to worry about fire in the dorms, my computer has a firewall." - Scott

"Whenever I walk into this room I feel like I'm on the outside looking in on a zoo..." - Scott

"Sometimes when I get sad, I just have to look at myself in the mirror and I'm happy again." - Ankur

"Wait, your brother's 21? He could drive us to In'N'Out!" - Scott

"No, it's just Adrian's toothbrush" - Luis, upon hearing the fire alarm go off at 4:00 AM

"I bet you $100 I could jump out the window and land on my feet." - From the 2nd floor study lounge

"www.metronome.com" - My roomate when he woke up, we still have no idea what he meant by this and what triggered this

"Just don't be surprised if I crawl into bed with you and call you beautiful." - The guy who had my bed last year, pointing at me.

"what does aggregate mean?" - Kim
"Doesn't it mean to anger or something?" - Nicole
"Oh, yeah, Meagn you aggregate me so much." - Ankur

"It was like a nuclear bomb." - Me, after downing an entire wad of Wasabi

"Crap, your chair just shanked me." - Dionne

"Wow that bug is smart, he must be from Stanford!" - Luis

"What kind of cell phone falls on the floor?" - Me

"I need to think of something warm... ICE CREAM SUNDAY!!!" - Wendy

"My grammar's really suck." - Adrian

"Why do I always get the 7 of Spades!" - Keith
"Uh, Keith, that's an 8 of Clubs." - Steve

[Kevin Kolodziej]

Last year, the haunted floor decided to do smoke machines for Halloween. Good idea sure...and there are ways to pull it off...but now when you block every opening to your room! What'd they think was going to happen??? Fortunately it was a rather warm night and the hour or so spent outside wasn't too bad.

One of my structural professors has the best quotes ever. In my concrete class this term, we were talking about a German guy that came up with a method for finding capacity or something like that. So my prof says, "Has anyone seen Spinal Tap?" and goes on to talk about how they put umlaughts over random letters. He then made the connection that this guy was German and proceeded to put umlaughts over the B and N in the guy's name.

Okay, so maybe you had to be there =)

For the record, if you want college to be like HS (at least in terms of class size), MSOE would work for you. My largest class so far has been 30, with the average being about 20. Labs are less than 20, and even Senior Design has only 21. My Masters classes have a whopping 8 =)

Good luck, everyone. Just make sure you remember the college years!

Kev

[sanddrag]

"It is only in very rare circumstances that the angles in a triangle add up to 180 degrees"

"A cylinder IS a two dimensional object"

Both of those said by a calculus professor. Also, in this same class, the ground outside was wet so everyone's shoes were squeaking. But this one student couldn't resist sliding his shoes back and forth to make them squeak throughout the entire class. So, the professor gets annoyed and says "I'll take off my shoes if you take off your shoes" and the professor actually took off his shoes and remained without them for the rest of the class. I couldn't believe it. Whatever works I guess.

[Denman]

great thread
i don't have to worry toomuch about people knocking on doors, as the block of accomodation i'm in has 2 people sharing a bathroom between the room, and a locked door before the bathroom and the two doors for our room.
however
Prank calls.... usualyl at stupid times in the morning, and its free for internal calls.... Gwah!
THhe fire alarms havnt gone off in my block yet however the block accross the courtyard/quad has gone off at stupid times, and its so loud i can hear it over here...
you guys got nice small groups, i'm doing a course with 2 other people, (electronic engineering with maths) so we have to go to both ee and maths lectures. There is about 200 in maths and about 150 in ee... and i have a 26 hour plus labs timetable a week

[Brian Lesser]

Reminds me of a discussion we had in my Philosophy class...

We were talking about John Searle and his philosophy about the mind and body. Discussion on how living beings were the only ones who could THINK, our professor used the example of a computer. Although a computer could process information and perform tasks, it cannot go...

"...I don't want to be a computer, I want to be a dentist."

That's the exact quote my professor used...

10 points goes to anyone who knows which movie the original quote came from...

[Andy Baker]

Originally Posted by Brian Lesser

"...I don't want to be a computer, I want to be a dentist."

10 points goes to anyone who knows which movie the original quote came from...

Hmmm... not sure about that one. However, I bet we all know where "... I don't want to be an elf, I want to be a dentist" came from.

Sorry for the tanget (well, not really). Carry on.

Andy B.

[KenWittlief]

not a movie:

"I dont want to be an Elf, Im going to be a Dentist"