CD's Unofficial Caption Contest #81

[Travis Hoffman]

Originally Posted by Koko Ed

(Staring despondently at shelf under robot...)

"What did I ever do wrong in my life to be stuck with these weak, flimsy, and inaccurate right handed joysticks every year? I needed six of the blasted things just to get us through a single competition!** Why, FIRST? Why must you torture me so with these abominations??? Whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!!!!!!!!!"


** Hyperbolized for effect. Objects in caption contest may be more useful than they appear.

[sciencenerd]

Even wearing an armband on his left hand to remember which was which, the kid still had to spend several minutes staring at the bewildering control layout before each match to remember which thing did what. Hey, with three joysticks and who knows how many buttons, sometimes it can be hard!

[Wayne Doenges]

Entry #1: Team 1597's driver was so weak from lack of sleep he decided to take a nap. When he woke up, everyone had most of their robots packed and the pits cleaned up.

Entry #2: Student on phone; "Yes mom, I packed my pajamas. No mom, I'm not going to eat any junk food. Yes mom, I'm having fun. Mom, I have to go, they just called our team to the arena. Bye mom"

[Andy Baker]

"Ok.... God... I've put all I have into this robot. I could use some help. Do you know this Archimedes guy? Well... we are playing on a field named after him here in Atlanta. You see, we're up against this robot from Hammond, Indiana the next match. I hear that they are pretty good. If you can sway a tetra or two our way, I sure would appreciate it."




Andy B.

[Greg Needel]

Entry 1:Team 1597 demonstrated their confidence at the championship by cuing for the Einstein field early Thursday.


Entry 2: Someone needs to tell team 1597 that they need to win their way to the Einstein field and not just show up and expect to be in the national finals.

[Taylor]

1. "I can't believe I ate the whole thing."
2. "Anybody know the shortest route back to Cleveland?"
3. FIRST Robot: $6,000. Add-ons: $3,500. Registration to Nationals: $5,000. Transportation: $3,500. Hotel room: $120/night. Remembering to bring the battery charger: Priceless.

[Kevin Kolodziej]

Robot: Now, lets start from the beginning. Where were you on the night of February 22, 2005?

Student: I told you, I was home sick!

Robot: That's not an excuse! I'm sick right now, but here I am ready to play.

Student: But you're a machi--

Robot: And you're not?? A good driver needs to be able to drive in his sleep! HEY! WAKE UP!

Student: zzzzzzZZZZzzzzz

Robot: ...I need to find some Krispy Kremes quick!

***Not part of entry*** I think this picture has generated some of the funniest captions I have EVER seen in the caption contest. Kudos to everyone!

Kev

[EricH]

The Force is strong with this one--or will be once he gets the control board out of the picture.

[MattD1Drift]

"Why is it no one but me think that our robot looks like a giant Shifter?"

[Goober!!!]

"OK you are a rookies bot and i know you dont like to be put on the pressure but you need to go out and do your thing and win and be the number 1 bot out there i know you are just so young but i believe in you I BELIEVE IN YOU!!!"

[DCA Fan]

The drive takes a moment to meditate before the match. The robot looks on in confusion.

[Gary Dillard]

Robot: "Sorry? I BET you're sorry. Sorry you got caught. Who was it? TELL me it wasn't that Wildstang Thang again. Did you push her big red button? She's always flaunting it too. Look at me when I'm talking to you! Don't you EVER mess around with another robot again or I'll drop you like a penalty flag, you hear me?"

[Ian Curtis]

*into cell phone that's on the side we can't see* Guys! Hey Guys! Where'd you put the Flightsticks?

*pause*

What do you mean the "Donut Fairy" took them. Wait, is that the Commander Keen 3 theme in the background. You guys took the Flighsticks back to the Omni to play Commander Keen?!? We have a match in 3 minutes! No, It's physically impossible for me to stand on the pressure pad, operate the arm, and drive at the same time! What are we gonna do?!?!?!

*pause*

You want me to look at the match schedule at a time like this!?!?! I don't think so! You guys are slacking off, and I'm sittin... I mean running around frantically trying to find someone to stand on the pressure pad. Okay, fine, I'll look at the schedule.

*looks down*

Oooooooohhhhhh, we're paired with 67 and 71. But that doesn't matter, I still need someone to stand on the pressure pad!

[Billfred]

I think this might've been the hardest contest to judge in ages. Normally one sticks out, but when I have a pool of five or six potential winners, one has to resort to other techniques. Like just settling on one and saying first place goes to...

Originally Posted by Andy Baker

"Ok.... God... I've put all I have into this robot. I could use some help. Do you know this Archimedes guy? Well... we are playing on a field named after him here in Atlanta. You see, we're up against this robot from Hammond, Indiana the next match. I hear that they are pretty good. If you can sway a tetra or two our way, I sure would appreciate it."

Second place goes to:

Originally Posted by iCurtis

*into cell phone that's on the side we can't see* Guys! Hey Guys! Where'd you put the Flightsticks?

*pause*

What do you mean the "Donut Fairy" took them. Wait, is that the Commander Keen 3 theme in the background. You guys took the Flighsticks back to the Omni to play Commander Keen?!? We have a match in 3 minutes! No, It's physically impossible for me to stand on the pressure pad, operate the arm, and drive at the same time! What are we gonna do?!?!?!

*pause*

You want me to look at the match schedule at a time like this!?!?! I don't think so! You guys are slacking off, and I'm sittin... I mean running around frantically trying to find someone to stand on the pressure pad. Okay, fine, I'll look at the schedule.

*looks down*

Oooooooohhhhhh, we're paired with 67 and 71. But that doesn't matter, I still need someone to stand on the pressure pad!

Honorable mentions go to:

1) Gary Dillard
2) EddieMcD
3) dlavery
4) Heidi "Short Stack" Foster
5) Jay H 237
6) KathieK
7) nehalita
8) skimoose
9) Jay Trzaskos
10) Zach Purser
11) Al Skierkiewicz
12) EricH
13) sciencenerd

And the burn award...

Originally Posted by T. Hoffman

(Staring despondently at shelf under robot...)

"What did I ever do wrong in my life to be stuck with these weak, flimsy, and inaccurate right handed joysticks every year? I needed six of the blasted things just to get us through a single competition!** Why, FIRST? Why must you torture me so with these abominations??? Whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!!!!!!!!!"


** Hyperbolized for effect. Objects in caption contest may be more useful than they appear.

Which means the scores are:

Gary Dillard	78
MissInformation	74
T. Hoffman	72
Rich Wong	66
EddieMcD	62
Dlavery	61
Jay H 237	59
Andy Baker	55
Icurtis	54
Al Skierkiewicz	52
Jay Trzaskos	52
EricH	50
KathieK	47
Nehalita	45
Wayne Doenges	44
Dorienne 007	41
Bcahn836	41
Arefin Bari	38
Koko Ed	34
DCA Fan	30
Artdutra04	29
EricS-Team180	29
Amanda Morrison	26
Ashley Christine	24
JosephM	23
Goober!!!	23
Xzvrw2	23
“Big Mike”	21
Andrew Blair	21
Kyle Love	19
KenWittlief	18
Alex Cormier	18
Conor Ryan	15
Mechanicalbrain	15
1derboy	13
Jessica Boucher	11
Tim Delles	11
KarenH	11
JVN	10
Pat McCarthy	10
Squirrelrock	10
Bill_Hancoc	10
Kjhobin	10
Richardp	9
Greg Needel	9
Dave Scheck	8
Kevin Kolodziej	8
Fruity Pebbles	7
DanielBCR	7
Tiffany34990	7
Brandy836	6
Elgin Clock	6
Miketwalker	6
RoboMom	6
Greencactus3	6
Sciguy125	6
Lil' Lavery	5
Lukevanoort	5
InfernoX14	5
Sciencenerd	5
Wetzel	5
Killerofkiller	4
Skimoose	4
Cyberguy34000	4
Denman	4
Zach Purser	4
Spears312	4
Adam Richards	3
Beth Sweet	3
Rich Kressly	3
RogerR	3
Ryan Foley	3
Tytus Gerrish	3
MattD1Drift	3
Shyra1353	3
Andrew Rudolph	2
BuddyB309	2
Eria4044	2
Kyle	2
Meredith343MiM	2
Mini-D67	2
Ogre	2
Sammy	2
Eugenia Gabrielov	2
Liz C	2
Matt Attallah	2
Rohan_DHS	2
anna~marie	1
Barry Bonzack	1
Ben Lauer	1
Boiler	1
Budda648	1
CarpeDiem	1
Cody C	1
Dubious elise	1
First degree	1
John Wanninger	1
KyleGilbert45	1
Lisa Perez	1
Meaubry	1
Mr. A	1
Mrblack298	1
Pwilczynski	1
Rees2001	1
Saru29	1
Termite233	1
Wilshire	1

Onward!