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  #1   Spotlight this post!  
Unread 26-01-2006, 12:45
Dr.Bot
 
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Surgeon General's Warning.

Honest, I was just trying to hack my cell phone to get it to display the GPS data, and I got the following Text Message:

"HackNet News, Washington DC, Federated States of North America, Jan 30, 2026."

The Surgeon General of the Federated States has determined that robotics competition is hazardous to your mental health. He is proposing that the three houses of congress pass legislation that all materials that contain robotics content be suitably flagged as hazardous and appropriate filters and firewalls be installed on all citizen's data access keys.

In a virtual news conference today, a spokesperson from the Surgeon General's office answered questions from various news net reporters. When asked what prompted this radical finding, the following points were made:

"For the past several years, our office has been receiving many complaints about the effect of robotics competitions on our citizens, particularly our youngest and most impressionable. We studied the effect of robotics competition on a targeted group of convicted criminals and political activists, all sentenced to brain wipe and reprogramming. What we found really horrified us. Robotics Competition turned out to be one of the most addictive activities we studied. It ranks way up there with cocaine and sex, and it is much more addictive then some allowed activities like smoking pot and brain jack video games.

Further more, it leads to other serious addictions to banned substances such as pizza and Krispy Kream donuts. The organizations that promote robotics competition are some of the most cynical and subversive we have discovered. They are continually expanding their reach to younger and younger citizens. They started out with college age, pushed down to high school, then middle and elementary school. Now that they are pushing a robotics pre-natal subliminal tape program, they've gone too far. Just like drug pushers, the first 'hit' is always free.
Before you know it, you're hooked, and your next 'fix' of robotics is the only thing on your mind.

What is most frightening is people involved in robotics competition become confident capable citizens, who God forbid me saying this, think for themselves. This is just the kind of horror our government is sworn to prevent."


Sorry - I lost the rest of the message.
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Unread 26-01-2006, 12:55
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Re: Surgeon General's Warning.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Dr.Bot
...Further more, it leads to other serious addictions to banned substances such as pizza and Krispy Kream donuts...
NOOOOOOO!!!!!

i'll begin construction of a massive underground cryogenic donut freezer sometime late tonight. if anyone else wants in on this, i'd be happy to oblige. remember, cold, stale donuts are better than no donuts at all.
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Last edited by RogerR : 26-01-2006 at 13:04.
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Unread 26-01-2006, 13:00
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Al Skierkiewicz Al Skierkiewicz is offline
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Re: Surgeon General's Warning.

Hi! I'm from the government and I am here to help you.
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Unread 26-01-2006, 13:38
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Re: Surgeon General's Warning.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Al Skierkiewicz
Hi! I'm from the government and I am here to help you.
Yeah! Right!!
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Unread 26-01-2006, 13:42
JVGazeley JVGazeley is offline
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Re: Surgeon General's Warning.

Well they aren't illegal over here
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Unread 26-01-2006, 13:50
Steve W Steve W is offline
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Re: Surgeon General's Warning.

Quote:
Originally Posted by JVGazeley
Well they aren't illegal over here
Yet! The movement is spreading.
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Unread 26-01-2006, 17:35
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Re: Surgeon General's Warning.

Quote:
Originally Posted by RogerR
NOOOOOOO!!!!!

i'll begin construction of a massive underground cryogenic donut freezer sometime late tonight. if anyone else wants in on this, i'd be happy to oblige. remember, cold, stale donuts are better than no donuts at all.
lol a sugar craving, donut eating diabetic....it never ceases to amaze me roger....
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Unread 26-01-2006, 20:48
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Lightbulb Re: Surgeon General's Warning.

Quote:
Originally Posted by RogerR
NOOOOOOO!!!!!

i'll begin construction of a massive underground cryogenic donut freezer sometime late tonight. if anyone else wants in on this, i'd be happy to oblige. remember, cold, stale donuts are better than no donuts at all.
Wow thats really strange and i'd be happy to be in this underground donut freezer group....lol.....bring some with sprinkles.....
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Unread 26-01-2006, 22:09
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Re: Surgeon General's Warning.

Quote:
Originally Posted by RogerR
NOOOOOOO!!!!!

i'll begin construction of a massive underground cryogenic donut freezer sometime late tonight. if anyone else wants in on this, i'd be happy to oblige. remember, cold, stale donuts are better than no donuts at all.
Count me in! you might want to notify Dave also...
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Unread 26-01-2006, 22:45
Mr. Freeman Mr. Freeman is offline
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Re: Surgeon General's Warning.

We'll just have to build a robot army to defeat the oppressors of Krispy Kream and pizza hut. But I see no mention in the article of mountain dew, at least we get to keep our caffeine dependency.
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Unread 27-01-2006, 08:18
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Re: Surgeon General's Warning.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mr. Freeman
We'll just have to build a robot army to defeat the oppressors of Krispy Kream and pizza hut. But I see no mention in the article of mountain dew, at least we get to keep our caffeine dependency.
Shhhhhh! You're going to ruin our Dew moonshining... um I mean... legitimate business!
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Unread 30-01-2006, 19:25
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Re: Surgeon General's Warning.

Dew is good, so are donuts and sugar, and especially caffine, ILOVEMYCAFFINE!!!!!!!!1 CAFFINECAFFINECAFFINECAFFINE!!!!!!!! WHOOOOO!! Sorry, had a few sodas before this. But that might be a good idea...
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Unread 30-01-2006, 19:58
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Re: Surgeon General's Warning.

Kream is actually "Kreme", and you missed a quotation mark. The Federated States has asked me to thank you for passing along their message, but to please misspell more common items, and less obscure ones, so that it looks more authentic.
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Unread 30-01-2006, 21:52
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Re: Surgeon General's Warning.

Quote:
Originally Posted by BlackRoboDragon
Dew is good, so are donuts and sugar, and especially caffine, ILOVEMYCAFFINE!!!!!!!!1 CAFFINECAFFINECAFFINECAFFINE!!!!!!!! WHOOOOO!! Sorry, had a few sodas before this. But that might be a good idea...

Another good idea: all the Monster Energy Drink that you can find, in every variety. We need about 100000 of them to float our boats tonight!
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Unread 30-01-2006, 22:03
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Re: Surgeon General's Warning.

Quote:
Originally Posted by RogerR
NOOOOOOO!!!!!

i'll begin construction of a massive underground cryogenic donut freezer sometime late tonight. if anyone else wants in on this, i'd be happy to oblige. remember, cold, stale donuts are better than no donuts at all.
well this can add to one of those many great projects you have lined up... when you get it done let me know.
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