Championship - Divisional Stories 2006

[Dillon Compton]

Originally Posted by looneylin

Archimedes Death Ray

Once upon a time, in a land far, far away, namely Boston, Massachusetts, Woodie Flowers was stumped. On the Discovery Channel show Mythbusters, Adam and Jamie challenged the world to design the Ultimate (922) Archimedes Death Ray. Basically, Woodie would have to construct a burning glass to set a ship, anchored within bow and arrow range, afire.

Woodie gathers a T.E.A.M. (1508) of Technowarriors (768) and Rocketeers (20) to design this ray of death! Woodie called this team, Team Voltage (386)! They burnt some Midnight Mechanics (812) designing this device, but with Eagle Engineering (1138), they can accomplish their goal. They did this for days and days, but all of a sudden King Tech (1675) makes a mistake! It looks like this is the end for Team Voltage! But lo and behold, the RoboWizards (522) come into the MIT lab and they tell Woodie, "Think Pink (233)"
Woodie exclaims, "Holy Cow (1538)! I should have seen it before! Yes, We need to do some Metal-In-Motion (343)! We need to Royal Assault (357 Go Jesters!) this situation! We need to use the might of the Firebirds (433 YAY!) and attack this thing with Gael Force (126)!”
The rest of Woodie's team, who he passionately refers to as the Children of the Swamp (179), say, "Glenelg (888)!!!" because they're too exhausted to utter real words.

From that point, the Children of the Swamp and Woodie felt like Dragon Slayers (538), they were going to tackle this Monster (308)! They would go to the Alpines (159), the top of Montclair (555), and gather strength, because that was the smart thing to do. They even searched ChiefDelphi (47) for answers!

While traveling, they met up with a group of RoboRaiders (75, no offense) who did NOT use extreme Caution (1492) because they did NOT wear safety goggles (OMG)! They were Noncomformants (1654) and they were HYPER (69) because they drank too much red bull. They were mean. They were a mean Green Machine (1816). They had Arctic Warriors (174) on their side. The RoboRaiders threw X-Cats (191) at Woodie! OH NO!!! They were like a Robotic Plague (375)! Team Voltage wouldn't stand for that!!!!
Team Voltage threw Robobees (836) and Killer Bees (33) at the RoboRaiders and some TEC CReW Hammerheads (226) at them! The RoboRaiders responded by unleashing their Bionic Bulldogs (60) at Team Voltage! It was total Entropy (138)! When all of a sudden the Hokie Guard (401), Scarabian Knights (120), and Mechanical Marauders (271) arrived to help out Team Voltage!!! Together they were One TUFF Team (203)! They called themselves Team Roboto (447) and together they can make a Bovine Intervention (686) and defeat the RoboRaiders! Together, they shouted at the tops of their lungs, “We stand for the FIRST Bots of Independence (1723)! We will not let any team be Mad Town Coyotes (1323) or Devil Duckies (1266)! We are the Navi-Gators (1250) of FIRST! We are the Blue Knights (1057) of technology! Not just some Beachbots (330)! We stand for Explorers (468) of math and science and Neo-Teoltechians (499) everywhere!!! This speech is really long!!! Yet, fear our HighTechHigh (4), our Panther (1108) senses, our Cobra (1184) instincts, our Falcon’s (1626) eye! Yes! Fear our long speeches! In your face Pneubies (1595)! We are the Cyber Wolfs (647) of this match! Can you handle our Positronic Panthers (486)!?! Ich didn’t think so!” So Team Roboto won because the RoboRaiders gave up because Team Roboto’s speech was sooooo long! Team Voltage thanked their alliance for a job well done, they certainly were not Greybots (973) in the match. They were the Mechanicatz (1568) of City High (1743).

Afterwards, Team Voltage discussed how they were going to design the death ray on the top of Mountclair. They were TBDed (1394), they didn’t know what the Barringer and Tech (1367) they were doing! So, they first decided to see what materials they could muster. The Children of the Swamp gathered all the materials they could find, which included Element 945 (945), Thunder Chickens (217), and Washtenuts (1549).

Woodie saw problems coming up with the death ray, but lo and behold Dean Kamen swoops down and saves the day with his denim cape and jumpsuit (YAY)!!! He uses his bare hands to Cold Fusion (1279) websites, and uses his Lightening (862) eyes to weld metals with his Diablo (87) force! After he finished in the nick of an Adambot (245), and glances over his work like a Panther (Tech 292), he tells Team Voltage, "Now, may this be a lesson to do More Robotics (1714). For all your hard work, I'll give you the serial code to the 2007 FRC manual! Write it down quick because I won’t repeat!!! XQ744-1610-1756-1803-1941 (Teams : 1450,744,1610,1756,1803,1941)”
Then Dean looks into the sunset and shouts, “Northern Knights (296) assemble!!!” His posse of robots assembled and they rode off.
Woodie stood in awe and said dreamily, "Dean, the Lionheart (1302), he's sooo cool! He's certainly a THS Warrior (585) or however the Children of the Swamp said it. Ok, Children of the Swamp! Let’s go build us a death ray!”

When they finished building Archimedes Death Ray, Woodie and the Children of the Swamp go to the International House of Technology (1414) to eat Exploding Bacons (1902) and they got all HYPER (69).Then they all C.R.A.S.H. (999) at the Bedford Express (1023).

The next day, Team Voltage showed their death ray on Mythbusters. They went. They conquered (well, they managed to set fire to a ship with mirrors.) And, they achieved gracious professionalism and shiny awards.

THE END

1394 is the Juggernaut... not TBDed