FAHA: Giving Credit Where Credit is Due

[Beth Sweet]

We have quite an interesting situation here, one I’ve come across myself. I’m sure that many other FIRSTers have as well. I hope that it will receive many replies, and maybe some potential solutions to the problem! Without further adieu…

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On my team we have quite a few members, but I’d say about half show up and do the work. I recently read a college application of a "member" that doesn’t show up and they put down they were the build team leader, an officer, and an active member. They also put down they organized all the outreach programs and events. This really makes me upset!

This makes me mad because I and about 10 students do most of that work on the team. We sacrifice a lot of sleep, grades, and time to make things happen on our team. And for someone to take what we do and use it for their own glory really sets me off! What gives them the right!?

Does someone paying their dues give them the right to lie on their college applications? ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

FIRST-a-holic Anonymous mailbox is a place to share your concern and frustration about your FIRST experience anonymously. It is the perfect place if you just want someone to listen, or ask for advice when you don’t know what to do. Submit your letters today at the FIRST-a-holic anonymous mailbox forum. If you wish to respond to this thread anonymously, please PM Beth or Bharat with your response and thread title.

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[Alan Anderson]

Does someone paying their dues give them the right to lie on their college applications?

This simple question has a simple answer: no.

I wouldn't go out of my way to chase down anyone this to whom this person has misrepresented himself, but I would certainly answer truthfully any questions asked of me regarding his role and activities on the team. I would also figuratively tap him on the shoulder, quietly remind him that he didn't actually do what he claimed, and point out that in today's world such false claims are easily discovered by anyone who cares about the applicant's credentials.

[sanddrag]

This is a situation that happens all too often, but cannot be corrected without a big mess. My advice would be to leave it alone. Some people naturally "sell" themselves beyond the limits of truth. But believe me, when they get into the real world, other people will quickly see through it. There is only a finite amount of time a facade can remain standing. Be who you are; it will get you far. Don't get caught up in other people who display themselves as someone other than who they are. Let them be, and the natural turn of the world shall correct the situation with time.

[Wetzel]

How you respond, I think, depends in part on how you came to read the college application. If it was given to you for review, then by all means bring it up! If it was left sitting out somewhere and you looked through it then, well, you probably should not have have read it. In this case, I would proceed as Alan has suggested and just be honest about what the person has done if asked.

Not in the "he was not an officer" type way, but just point out what they did help with. The person asking will have the list of what they claim in front of them and if you don't mention those they will either ask about them or assume that they exaggerated.

This is not anything that goes away, and learning to deal with people issues is one of the hardest parts about growing up.
Wetzel

[Eugenia Gabrielov]

The college admission process is a strange one - you practically sell yourself, searching for a balance between too involved and not involved enough, for an even ground of leadership, participation, and genuine personal interest in an activity.

No, it is not right that the student has exaggerated their participation. If they are asking for a letter of recommendation from the lead team mentor, it is very possible they will be called on it. Other than that, the only thing that can really solve the situation is changing the way you handle team participation. Good luck!

[Scott Ritchie]

I am not sure how to say this without sounding like a callused old dried up prune. When you are doing FIRST things you can’t let yourself worry about others and things like this. In a way you are learning another of life’s hard lessons compliments of FIRST. I found out and watched others find out you can’t expect fair treatment, representation, or recognition through this program as a volunteer-mentor. All you can do is continue to do what you do and do it for the right reasons (i.e. inspiring others). This isn’t a grow up and quit wining response at all. It is to say that if you are looking for justice and due recognition this is a hard place to find these things. During my leadership time at Cyber Blue I found that many people want to accuse you of this and take credit for that, and that is ok as long as our mission is being attained and the kids being focused on. If you are in the trenches through the long haul you will be able to talk such a better game in an interview that their heads will spin. In a nut shell you keep the students and the program in crosshairs and let karma work her magic.

[JaneYoung]

Originally Posted by Scott Ritchie

If you are in the trenches through the long haul you will be able to talk such a better game in an interview that their heads will spin.

Many years ago, I developed a particularly interesting art concept for promoting a 'product'. The 'product' was my on-going semester experience in a class. Someone who lived on the same floor as I did in my dorm would stop by for tea and chat regarding our class. This person submitted her project a week early - and guess what, it was my concept/my format. I was unaware and when mine was submitted, I was called into the professor's office and accused of cheating/copying. I was 19. It was a difficult situation and I did assure the professor that my work was my own and nothing had been copied or stolen with regard to my art concept/promotion of materials.

I learned a lot from that experience. I learned the bitter pill of receiving a bad grade for a lot of hard work, good work. I also learned that what the person did in a way reflected on me grade wise for that class but it did not reflect on who I was/what I was capable of. I moved on and learned to introduce my work/concepts to the professors early in the class assignment for approval, whether they requested them or not.

What Scott says is true. What that student chooses to do will affect that student. The important thing is that you and your fellow team members keep the focus on what you are doing, what you are contributing. Don't allow bitterness or resentment to impact the team's work or attitude, just keep moving forward and enjoying your part of the process and your time with the team.

[Arefin Bari]

Originally Posted by Beth Sweet

Does someone paying their dues give them the right to lie on their college applications?

Like Alan pointed out that the simple answer to that question is No.

In real world, this happens way too many times and way too often. It's understandable that it makes many upset. But, satisfy yourself by asking yourself, "Have I paid my dues to give myself the right to tell the truth on a college application?" If the answer to that question is "Yes," look at the positives sides and smile.