College Essay

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Help me out here. Give me some insight into my essay.

Describe a significant opportunity, challenge, or setback you have faced. What impact did it have on you?


There is no audible likeness from the partisan crowd until a split second after the final score emerged. Somehow we just stood there in disbelief, at the game we just witnessed with all the makings of legend; a rematch of last year’s championship match with two fierce rivals, with victory being decided only in the final seconds. A single clap broke the silence and it seemed to exorcise the silence that hung over the crowd. The applause came in waves, growing into a fever pitch. The most valuable players weren’t All-American athletes, but amazing pieces of machinery, robots built by high school students for the FIRST Robotics Competition.

The FIRST Robotics Competition opened a gateway to allow imagination to become reality. In the first year, expectations were nonexistent and this alleviated the pressure of the task. We had six weeks and eighty five hundred dollars to build a robot. The facets of the competition modeled an actual engineering firm: public relations, planning, design, manufacturing, and programming. Coordination and team work was a key. There were no shortage of questions that year, everyone was a rookie, even engineering professionals volunteering at our school asked us questions. Their presence gave me valuable insight into real-world engineering. I found something I enjoyed doing and I didn’t mind the long hours, working late into the night, occasionally working weekends all for the sake of deadlines. Even among the hectic work pace, we found time to enjoy ourselves and we all made new friends.

Six weeks of focused brainstorming, real-world team work, mentoring, project time lines, deadlines, and fun culminated in competition. It had all the feel of a sporting event complete with the thrill of success and the agony of defeat. I couldn’t tell disappointment in their eyes as we watched the championship match on the sidelines. We were all thinking the same thing. We were already looking forward towards next year. My friends and I wanted to do this again, something we loved.