For the sole purpose that this thing is reeeeally long… I’m giving it its own thread… I grabbed the team names from a combo of CD and the FIRST website. Sorry if I got someone’s name wrong! (PM me if you want the version where the names are italicized)
Once upon a time BOB and his friend GUS were hanging out at GUS’s house, playing guitar hero and reading up on CD. It was 1 week before the Championship event and ROBOTICS was the only thing on their minds.
“CHAbots!” BOB yelled, “I just hit Infinity!”
“Well aren’t you a High Roller” GUS laughed.
“This Kil-A-Bytes, I wish we were going to Atlanta this year,” BOB whined, putting down his guitar.
“You know,” GUS said, “I think, if we left now, we could get there…”
“Well, if we’re gonna go, we’d better RUSH!” BOB said, jumping up, “I’ll pack my bags!”
The two hurried and packed their bags like Madtown, grabbed their keys and hopped into the car. Within moments, they had hit the highway, cranking up the Voltage on the radio.
Once they were on the road, BOB and GUS were Cruzin’ Comets on their way to Atlanta!
Near North Student Robotics Initiative, BOB started whining. “GUS, can we stop? I’m starving…”
“Are you serious? We’ve only been on the road for an hour!”
“Yeah, just hit a grocery store, I’ll just get a NEW Apple Corps.”
GUS pulled over at the Phoenix exit and found the nearest grocery store. They both got out of the car and went on their Cooney Quest.
BOB went into the produce department and grabbed his NEW Apple Corp, while GUS went to the refrigerated section. He browsed for a bit, then stopped in front of the meats and pulled out a package.
“How in the heck are we gonna cook that?!” BOB laughed.
“Well, we’ll just put it on the hood of the car, it’s hot enough to cook…”
“Exploding Bacon!!!”
“Haha, ok ok, maybe not the best idea,” GUS said, putting the package back into the fridge.
The two paid for their food and walked back to the car. As they were getting in, they heard planes overhead. They looked up at the Flyers and applauded the Falcons. “Holy Bluebotics! Those things are Firebirds,” BOB yelled out, “It’s making a Royal Assault in the sky!”
“I know,” GUS shouted, “That C Company is a White Hurricane in the sky! Hope they don’t get Out of Orbit!”
“All I know is that those planes are sweet, they must have been made by some Extreme Engineers!” BOB called out. “We’d better get back on the road if we’re gonna make it in time.”
The car revved up and hit the road again. The boys started groovin to Metal and Soul, turning up the radio. The more they drove the more they relaxed. Suddenly, they heard sirens and saw a flashing red light behind them.
“The FEDS, are you kidding me?” BOB cried out, “What’d we do?!”
“I think I know The Answer to that one,” GUS said sheepishly, decelerating and pulling over.
The officer walked up the side of the boys’ car as they rolled down their window. “Hey there you Steampunks, do you know why I pulled you over?”
“I don’t imagine it was because you liked our ‘My other car is a robot’ bumper sticker was it?” GUS joked.
“Not quite,” laughed the officer. “You guys were driving a little fast out there, did someone light a FIRE under you?”
“We’re on our way to the World Championship Robotics competition sir, we must have gotten a little excited,” GUS said.
“What’s a robotics competition?” the officer asked.
“Oh man,” BOB started, “robotics competitions are the best. You’ve got RoboWarriors, Robotic Knights, Bobcat Robotics, Panther Robotics¸ RoboVikes, RoboLions, RoboRaiders, and more!”
“Wow, that sounds really cool, but hey, watch your speed while you get there, hit the cruise control, will ya?”
“Sure, thanks!” GUS said. The officer walked back to his car and the guys pulled off. “Man, no ticket, what a Wes Tech Anomaly! You must be a serious Miracle Workerz BOB.”
As the boys kept driving, it got darker and darker, becoming a very Black Knight. Suddenly, from the side of the road, GUS saw 2 eyes beating out from the bushes.
“BOB, what is that?!” he yelled.
BOB bounced out of his semi-sleep state and stared out into the woody darkness. “I think it’s some sort of Wildcat,” he said, “a Bobcat maybe? A Channel Cat? A TigerTron?”
“That cat looks a little bigger BOB, I think it might be a Pink Panther! Do we have PantherTech-nology in this car?”
“I don’t think so GUS, better kick the gas!”
The engine kicked like a Knight of Fury, getting the car and its passengers away from the beady eyes.
“Man, that engine is a serious GearDevil,” BOB reveled.
“Yeah, it’s a pretty serious Broncobot gotta love engine Evolution.”
The two got off at the next exit and decided that the big cat scared them into needing sleep.
When the Nighthawks stopped crowing, the pair knew that it was time to get back on the road. BOB looked up and wished on the last STARbot and got into the car.
The pair spent hours driving. They flew by Montclair, Forsyth, Icarus, Bixby, and SARGON. As they drove the pair became Hypnobots by one particular exit. They pulled off the road and saw the sign announcing the town name “Hammond, IN, home of World Champion Robotics Team Hammond.”
They pulled into a gas station and saw that in the field next door, there was a battle reenactment of the Westside Boiler Invasion. BOB and GUS went over and watched, happy to look at something other than pavement.
The NASA Knights were teamed up with Gompei and the Herd on the far side with the Hokies Guard-ing the fort. The Tewksbury Titans had grouped with the Centurians and the Spartans and were displaying some serious Kekoa O’ Haaheo (Warrior Pride).
“What do you think GUS, place your bet.”
“I don’t know man, it’s a Wild Card, let’s flip a coin.”
Sides were picked and the battle raged on.
“Where’s Waldo?” a lady behind them asked.
“He’s right there,” the guy with her replied winking, “you learn to find him on the field pretty quick, Precision Guessworks.”
As the two sides were both almost ready to give in, the field was suddenly invaded by iPirates, who attacked both groups. “3 alliances,” BOB said, “we’ll have to mention that to GDC for next year…”
The T-Rex Juggernauts swept the field in a Vortex, clawing their Talons at everything in sight. The Pioneer Robotics Organization of the 3 alliance world, they showed no fear.
“Man, those groups are some seriously Desperate Penguins,” GUS chuckled.
After the fight had ended, BOB and GUS got back on the road. The wheels spun and kicked up a bunch of dirt. “Tatsu!” Bob sneezed.
“Cazuuntite.”
The guys finished the day and spent the evening sleeping. In the morning when they went to start the car, it made some funny noises. They pulled it into the shop to make sure that everything was ok. The Toltechs at the shop had Uberbots to check out the basics of the car. The techs were Swart-dogs, fixing the problem in record time. As they waited, BOB started dancing to the TechnoTicks playing in the shop.
“Ok, for all of the repairs, how much are we looking at?” GUS asked.
“Just about Epsilon Delta,” the tech said.
“Ugg,” GUS whined, pulling out the money.
Money was traded for keys and the guys were off like Wolverines, trying to make up lost time.
After days of driving, BOB finally saw what he had been waiting for! The city limit for Atlanta! It was Thursday morning and a MORT of teams were just about to enter the building. The Robodox were full of teams loading in and the essence of Worlds was in the air.
Grinning, the guys parked the car, and ran into the venue.
Archi!
Medes!
Clap clap clap
“Aw man,” BOB yelled, “let’s go watch Archimedes bring home the gold on Einstein!!!”
Thanks, Beth for this great and funny story (I’m sure all the great team names helped).