Arrrr!! It be robot pirate jokes!!

Arrrr! It be National ‘Talk Like A Pirate’ Day on Sunday the 16th. I be requesting any yellow-bellyed robot builders out there to submit any funny robot pirate jokes for all of our Harrr Harrr enjoyment! Have some rum and have some fun!

I am a HUGE fan of Talk Like a Pirate Day, matey. Best be tellin’ the jokes of the high seas, or the plank for you, scurvy dogs!

Wow. Now that I’ve demonstrated to the ChiefDelphi community just HOW badly I talk like a pirate…

My favorite pirate pick up line has to be:
‘ARRRRRGGGHH! Your booty shivers me timbers!’ :slight_smile:

a pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel in his pants and the bartender says “you know you have a steering wheel in your pants?” and the pirate says “ARRRRRRR, it’s driving me nuts”

bad but funny…amanda you can borrow my eye patch for the day if you want

Did you see that new movie


(yes someone was gonna say it and yea… it was me)

Well boggle me barnacles! It’s that time again already?

What does a pirate say when he takes over santa’s job?
ho ho ho and a bottle of rum

How much did the pirate pay for his peg leg and hook? An arm and a leg!

And I’ll stop now while I still can…


Shiver Me timbers land lubber… Sunday is the 18th…
Polly wanna date change? <whistle>

A pirate walks into a bar and the bartender says, “Hey, I haven’t seen you in a while. What happened, you look terrible!”

“What do you mean?” the pirate replies, “I’m fine.”

The bartender says, “But what about that wooden leg? You didn’t have that before.”

“Well,” says the pirate, “We were in a battle at sea and a cannon ball hit my leg but the surgeon fixed me up, and I’m fine, really.”

“Yeah,” says the bartender, “But what about that hook? Last time I saw you, you had both hands.”

“Well,” says the pirate, “We were in another battle and we boarded the enemy ship. I was in a sword fight and my hand was cut off but the surgeon fixed me up with this hook, and I feel great, really.”

“Oh,” says the bartender, “What about that eye patch? Last time you were in here you had both eyes.”

“Well,” says the pirate, “One day when we were at sea, some birds were flying over the ship. I looked up, and one of them dropped one in my eye.”

“So?” replied the bartender, “what happened? You couldn’t have lost an eye just from some bird poop!”

“Well,” says the pirate, “I really wasn’t used to the hook yet.”

Arhar, har, fit of coughing, rubs throat, har. So me matey, which is it, Sunday or the 16th? :smiley:

To inform ye scurvy dogs, the day o’ glory is Sunday the 19th. Harrr-harr-har

There was a ship back in the 1800’s and on that ship was a Brave Captain. Every time the ship got into a fight the captain would always request for his red pants and shirt. Well - lots of times his crew did with out a question. But one time someone had the courage to ask why- and he said he doesn’t want his crew to fight any less if he has been stabbed.

Well, one time (as they where fighting) he requested his red outfit as usual - but after about 30 minutes of fighting he requested brown pants. Now his crew was really stumped. They asked why.

Can you guess? :smiley:

So no one can see if when he crapped his pants?

What did the pirate say to the jokester?

Sorry, warning: this is a baaad joke. I just felt the need to post one, especially a bad one.

It’s that time of year again! Oh yes, it IS national talk like a pirate day! so…let’s hear all of your favorite pirate jokes and pirate sayings!


Sunday the 19th?! what are you using, a Mayan calender?

Q: what goes “Arrr, eyeee, Eeeeee, ohhhhhhh, doubleyou” ?
A: pirate taking an eye test.

wared me peg leg go?
and wared this here umbrella come from?

Ah-OI matey, what’re ya doin’?

Putting the ARRR-C on this here robot

(That was really bad… I had to say it, though :p)

This thread was started last year… that’s why the dates are off. But here’s another joke for the thread:

Q. How much does it cost a pirate to pierce his ears?
A. A buck-an-ear

Bad joke, I know… :rolleyes:

arrgh, I succumbed to the power of google the pirate on this one.

a little kid with a speech impediment dresses up as a pirate and goes trick or treating. he knocks on the door of a house and a man answers. “oh, i can see you’re dressed up as a pirate.” the man says. “but where are your buccaneers?” the kid gets really mad, and says “on the sides of my buckin’ head!”

…I think that this explains why our waiter at Applebee’s was cracking so many pirate jokes last Friday night…

On a sidenote, I would add a joke, but Greg Needel and Dave Lavery seem to have “taken” my only two. :frowning: