The Trackball Surfing Competition finals are about to begin. The refs are there to award points based on pain, humiliation, style, crowd amusement, and distance. An addition to the finals rounds is the ability to enter the Caption Contest as a victim, rated on a scale from -infinity to Billfred. If you wish to challenge any rulings, you must stand on a trackball in the challenge zone until you have finished presenting your case.
Kicking it into overdrive, the refs ruled, kept teams on track, didn’t blur the lines, kept their bladders from leaking, and tried not to run over Dan with their super-sized lineup. At the end of the day, they had run out of gas but still had plenty of hot air to spare.
Here we see some of the preliminary results of the Purdue miniaturization project. The billiards balls in the foreground can be used for scale comparison.
[NPOE] Gary, that -infinity is going to take a long time to recover from. Trust me, I know[/NPOE]
The IRI Planning Committee invited a special guest to give a lecture at IRI in 2008:
Sigmund Freud: “And looking at the referees on the field standing behind those big trackballs, it looks like you’re all in for quite an interesting discussion.”
Sorry, I realized my original post had I negative connotation.
In its place, I give thee:
This time on Candid Camera. These three referees are on the lookout for penalties, only to find that sitting on the track balls will land you on your back.
“I told them I would ref. I would wear the funny shirt and pledge to be fair. I even told them I would do a belly check when needed to check for line infractions. But will you look at that plastic in the center of the field! Who is going to clean that? I told them I don’t do windows!”