CD's Unofficial Caption Contest #781

Welcome to the sixteenth straight year of the Chief Delphi Unofficial Caption Contest! (Yes, this predates 3v3 play, Facebook losing the “the”, and a bunch of other signifiers that I’m old as hell.)

After the season-ending contest last week, here are the scores:

You        0

Instead, I give you the rules. (Other rules have been created, but these are the ones that see use.)

Normally, every entry gets an honorable mention worth two points because the old half-get-two-half-get-one format was a lot of work for basically zero difference. One particularly good zinger will receive the burn award and three points. Singles will be reserved for blatant copycat entries, things that cross “burn” into “okay chill dude”, or the truly incomprehensible. And don’t make me award a zero. (I think that’s happened once in 13 full years.)

There have been some updates to the rules over the years:

(“Working” gets a rather liberal interpretation, mind you.)

Since then, the only thing that’s changed is the deadline: **Sunday at midnight Eastern, **though entries posted afterward will count if they’re posted before I open the thread to score it.

Here’s this week’s picture:


In an alternate universe, Wayne Gretzky sees what ELSE can be done with hockey sticks and becomes an engineer.

The robots he builds win multiple Olympic hockey gold medals.

Safety glasses are adequate protective eyewear when in the pits.

Facemasks are not.

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Practicing Jedi mind control 6 years early.

Student: When they asked me if I had a couple of hockey sticks, I didn’t know they were going to cut them up for the robot.

I don’t know how I’m supposed to cost account for a broken cut up hockey stick. Can it be considered stock material? Is Play-It-Again-Sports a VENDOR? Did the tape applied before build season exclude it from COTS status, even though we bought it that way?

Outsider to first can’t tell whether the machine is a robot or an exercise bike

OK, the hockey sticks are from the Gretzky game clue. Now, where are the basketball and soccer sports equipment are on the robot? Could that tubing be from a soccer goal?

You know something’s up when robots are starting to play with hockey sticks. Dozer wouldn’t stand for it in his days.


Aaron: “Do you think this could pick up Power Cubes?”

Friend: “That’s not an intake, and what’s a Power Cube?”

Aaron: “This could definitely pick up Power Cubes.”

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Karthik would be happy they did not use tennis rackets.

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Send the robot to the penalty box. Two minutes for high-sticking.

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Someone told this freshman to watch the robot. Several hours later, there he remained.

This image’s poster originally wanted to cuss out those who played rough defense in 2014, but instead used gracious professionalism and posted this picture to represent the one word that described what it was like to be hounded by defenders:

The person on the right is a “he,” and the robot has two hockey sticks

Student: “So as long as we’re using the equipment, we’re a sport, right?”

I just made a new scoring spreadsheet, let’s do this thing!

First place goes to:

Second place goes to:

And the burn award goes to:

Which means the scores are:

GeeTwo 10
efoote868 5
Leap 3
GaryVoshol 2
EricH 2
Wayne Doenges 2
cgmv123 2
Osby 2
Tomithy 2
gellnick 2
hamac2003 2
Squirrel2412 2
jackTHEnerd 2
EricKline 2
quin 2


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