How does your team resolve conflicts?

I realize my profile has my team number in it, but let me pose a hypothetical for y’all:

Say your team was going through a tough time. Such as, in the past year you’ve had unexpected changes in leadership and a whole slew of new mentors, some with little training, and with no structural organization to help with the sudden growth. You have a lot of great mentors and students who kept it together for last season, all the way through Worlds, but you went all out over the summer and non-stop into the off-season, and it seems your students are feeling the strain. In the past month you’ve had a number of student complaints (mainly about other students), parent complaints (about a culture of bullying), mentor complaints (speaking out against a culture of secrecy), and at least one YPP complaint.

Your team has no bylaws, and if you ever did no one knows where they are. For the purposes of this discussion, you are a partially school-based team (sponsored by the school, no teachers as mentors), so counselors have been able to mediate some of the student conflicts. However, you have no formal process for resolving any other conflicts, especially between mentors. Or for electing or removing mentors, for that matter.

Say you yourself are one of those relatively new mentors, and maybe you’ve tried to help, but it’s hard to come into an organization as the new guy and start pointing out all the peeling wallpaper and cracks in the ceiling, especially when the rest of the house seemed to be holding up just fine. Until it wasn’t.

So assuming the team in question survives this rough patch, here are some questions to help it move forward:

  1. What kind of bylaws do other teams have? How do you structure your team?
  2. How does your team select its lead mentors? Are there teams that hold elections?
  3. How does your team handle student discipline issues? Student-student conflicts?
  4. If your team has student leaders who can make/influence decisions that affect their peers (e.g. drive team), how do you counsel or protect them from the inevitable backlash when kids are disappointed?

That’s a lot of questions. Any and all advice is appreciated. There’s a ton of great students on our team who deserve more than we’ve been giving them.

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To me it certainly seems like the team needs a least a week and maybe more off. We take off three months in the summer which might be too much, but this helps manage the stress.

To answer your questions:

  1. Our team has bylaws but only what is required by the state to be a 501c3. We do have a team handbook with rules and expectations which everyone signs and is expected to bide by; however, rules are not very effective in a culture of disrespect or people not regarding anything.
  2. The lead mentor has been the mentor who has been on the team for something like 12 years, but its not like he has this king like persona. The mentor team has gone through work to make sure important decisions are made with the knowledge and understanding of most/all the mentors and even student leadership if students can be privy to the information. Examples when it is only handled by mentors is inter student conflict or private matters.
  3. Student discipline is handled typically with a conversation either with the student about their behavior or with the two students who have an issue with each other; however, if problems persist we have sent people home and even removed kids from the team(always with warning) to ensure the culture is one of learning and respect.
  4. I think this one is very hard to do because the only way I have found is to build a strong relationship which has trust. This takes time, but you need to be completely honest with them. Don’t hide that people will be disappointed. Show them how to deal with that. Also clearly admit when you make a mistake and take ownership for the consequences. This helps them trust you and not feel alone when there are things that come up. In terms of the backlash, I would call it out when you see it. Call out when it is unreasonable, and say why it is unreasonable without denying peoples frustration; however, when it is reasonable, don’t let drive team get bulldozed but facilitate the conversation. Try to steer the conversation towards solutions instead of blame, but drive team needs to take ownership when they make a mistake.

I think having a meeting between mentors would be very helpful. I would recommend having it when students are not present and coming in with a desire to understand the perspective of the mentors in leadership. See if they see any of the problems you do. Its possible you are missing stuff and showing that you are willing to accept that, helps people not be defensive. If you are seeing a problem everyone is missing, ask about it. I love the line of, “I don’t know if I’m missing something, but [insert problem here] doesn’t seem right to me. Is this something other people have been able to deal with in the past?” I think ultimately having support for all the students is vital to a successful team. You need mentors on the same page to do that. I have personally caused problems trying to fix things myself, and I have also helped things by standing in the breach when other mentors wanted to do something which I thought was incorrect. I would also say this meeting should not be a one off thing. Consistent positive communication is a must because of how fast and complicated an FRC team is.

I missed the part about removing mentors. We have, thankfully, never had to deal with this. If the mentor is a danger to the students and that is agreed by the other mentors, that person should not be welcome in the school. If they refuse to leave, you have the ability to call the police. Student safety needs to be the foremost priority. If they are ineffective, I think that is a completely different issue. I think having a one on one conversation again with asking questions can be helpful to make them improve. I absolutely sucked as a rookie mentor. Other mentors talking to me helped me grow a lot. I don’t really know what to do if they aren’t open to improving though.

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Got out my computer to type out this response. I will also note that conflict resolution and buy-in are the topics for my 3rd installment of the leadership training modules I’ve been working on - it’s still in production though.

  1. What kind of bylaws do other teams have? How do you structure your team?

While our team doesn’t have an official set of bylaws in the traditional sense, we sign and our bound by our team handbook, which is a copy of the Citrus Circuits handbook and remains 90% the same. It gets reviewed by mentors each year, but doesn’t change much. The handbook outlines all norms, procedures, and expectations for students and mentors, as well as clarification on what constitutes unsafe behavior and removal from the program. If I need to mediate anything as head mentor, I always go back to the handbook so that I can reference something specific. Each student and their parent or guardian signs this before the season starts (our paperwork due date was 10/22 this year), so hypothetically everyone’s on the same page. Having a very very clear, publicly accessible set of rules is really important, because it means that students and mentors are working off of the same thing.

Team structure is really variable dependent on the program. From what I understand, 4561 is a pretty large program, so I’d look to other large programs (1678, 3128, 1923, for instance) to see how they organize. In general though, an organizational structure serves 2 key purposes: role clarity and delegation of responsibility. Especially in fast-paced environments with teenagers, it’s important that people know where they stand and what they’re supposed to be doing. By giving role clarity to students, you help them self-motivate and generate more buy-in for the team. Often, you can do this by giving them a strict set of responsibilities and a title to match it. Little Johnny FRC might not really know what’s going on or where to apply himself if he’s mechanical student # 12, but as Tooling and Organization lead he’ll feel more ownership and hopefully stay more involved. You have to strike a careful balance here, because you don’t want to come across as patronizing. Assigning a freshman to be “Mop Guy” probably won’t have the same effect. I sometimes see Safety Lead get tossed around in a half-hearted way to give a kid more responsibility but without the support needed to make it a meaningful experience, so stay aware of that.

When I think about team structure, I think about it as a series of buckets. You have some number of top level buckets, and each of those buckets has sub-buckets. You can go as far down that chain as you need. I’ve found that when the bottom-most bucket has 3-5 students, that’s usually a good place to stop. I’ve experimented with several different structures across the years, but the method I keep coming back to is having the top-level buckets be mechanical, controls, and non-tech (our team calls it MOO for Marketing, Outreach, and Operations). Some sub-bucket examples might be CAD, manufacturing, and construction for mech (you could also split these into subsystem-focused verticals), vision, swerve/autonomous, scoring movement, and electrical for controls, and impact, imagery, and business for non-tech. We also have separate competition roles as a way to further role clarity and generate buy-in. These are things like drive team, pit team, media, scouting (robot scout, super scout, shift coordinator), and strategy. I actually wrote an article about this as a student and then subsequently went to college to study human and organizational development, so it’s something I’ve thought about a lot. I’d be happy to talk about it more if you want to dive into anything deeper.

  1. How does your team select its lead mentors? Are there teams that hold elections?

For both teams I’ve worked with, the lead mentor was simply the person who showed up the most and put in the most time. I haven’t been on a team where more than one person actually wants that job. With 7525, I’m in person 20~ hours a week and then virtual working on stuff (either with students or in the background) another 20~ hours. We’ve had general consensus on who was fit for the role. Lead subteam mentors were similarly distributed. If I were in an environment where multiple people wanted the job, my sort orders would be around time commitment and organizational oversight. Being head mentor means a lot of running around doing squirrely things to make sure the team doesn’t fall apart (organizing KOP pickup, running mentor meetings, coordinating with the school/parent org/student parents), so the person who takes on that role needs to understand that. Day to day, I don’t actually spend that much time with the robot unless we’re thin on mechanical mentors, in which case I put on my project manager hat and step in. I have had to remove a mentor in the past. This came from unanimous agreement from our other mentors. I would need near-unanimous agreement to do it again, unless there was a safety/YPP issue involved.

  1. How does your team handle student discipline issues? Student-student conflicts?

This goes back to the handbook. You need to be very clear and upfront in the beginning, because students will lose all respect if they feel taken by surprise, tricked, or taken advantage of. If they know the expectations going in, it helps alleviate this. I would recommend looking into a norm-setting activity to start your (pre) season, as it gives you an open forum to really talk about these expectations and gives your students a voice (therefore generating more buy-in). You can also look to some exercises around group emotional and psychological safety to help set the tone. If your mentors and your lead students take it seriously, your younger students will too.

When I’m handling student discipline (student-student, student-mentor, or student-world), I remind myself to approach every situation with compassion. We’re here as educators, and high schoolers are partially-baked real people. Things are forming, but they’re still rising and growing. Something that might be dumb and obvious to you or me could be a totally new experience for them, and new is scary and uncomfortable. For me, the first step of conflict resolution is to try to understand what led that student to act in the way they did. Give them a chance to speak, share their story, and try to connect it to the rest of the situation. Then talk with them about how that affected others. I like to ask guiding questions, but let the student come to the conclusion on their own. Instead of “you really hurt Little Sally FRC’s feelings when you did [ ]”, I try to ask questions like “how do you think the others around you felt?” or “how would you feel if someone else did that?” I know this sounds really rudimentary and how you’d resolve something on an elementary school playground, but it’s important for teenagers (and adults). This is another place that norm-setting and holding a psychologically safe environment will pay dividends. This is largely the same for student-student conflicts as well, where I would serve as the mediator. If the issue is more work-related (skipping meetings, missing deadlines, etc), then I get a little more corporate and give that student a performance improvement plan (PIP). I make sure there are very clear deliverable objectives that need to meet a certain threshold of completeness by a very clear deadline, and outline a very clear consequence if that deadline isn’t met (demotion, suspension, removal). Again, this is an opportunity to generate buy-in with the student. Instead of handing them their assignment, work with them and let them lead the conversation around achievable goals and deadlines. You can definitely steer the conversation or push back on something if it’s too far out there, but letting them make the decisions is a really powerful tool - it either shows they know what’s realistic for them, or it shows them that the consequence is valid because they didn’t meet their own goal. For major safety infractions (tool safety, any largely damaging and unacceptable behavior) would start with the consequence and then add the PIP to work back up to a level of trust again.

  1. If your team has student leaders who can make/influence decisions that affect their peers (e.g. drive team), how do you counsel or protect them from the inevitable backlash when kids are disappointed?

This is a norm that gets set at the beginning of the year. We don’t pick favorites, we pick strategically. For example, I (as drive coach) pick students for drive team. I make it clear from the get-go what I prioritize in my drive team – it’s basically all soft skills. Keeping the expectations very clear helps, and it’s important that this is supported from the beginning by the mentors. The friction usually comes from when students feel that a student leader has an unfair amount of power that they don’t deserve. If that power is validated by mentors, it helps reduce some of that friction. I’ve found learning about the 9 types of power in leadership to be helpful, because it helped me better understand the dynamics at play. Students will be disappointed and there’s no real way to avoid that fully, and student leaders need to understand that some of that disappointment will reflect back onto them. Heavy is the head. Setting norms and reinforcing decision power will go a long way.

Please let me know if there’s any part of this that I can provide more clarification on or any other questions you might have, and I’d be happy to help. My DMs are also open, if that’s easier.

– Bryce | 7525 Head Mentor

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this advice is A+ and a certified Bryce Hanson banger

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Bryce, your reply is speaking to my soul. Thank you for all the resources. Our team had talked about holding a “leadership summit” for all students, but we didn’t find (make) time to squeeze it in yet. I am now even more convinced that we need one. The students have figured out that we need to make things better, and I think your reply will help guide them, or at least give them lots to think about!

We are on a forced hiatus now, because the school stepped in and shut us down until all their investigations are complete. A lot of students are disappointed, but it’s amazing how many of us (especially we who kept going all summer) are realizing how much we needed a break. Without rest, there can be no growth. All mammals know this, but in the excitement of doing All The Awesome Things, we kinda forgot.

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I love your line about how to approach speaking up–words of gold.

And especially:

“Consistent positive communication is a must because of how fast and complicated an FRC team is.”

I was new to FRC a couple years ago, and since then I’ve realized that the whole game–the whole organization–is set up to put on the pressure and keep it coming. We have ambitious kids and ambitious mentors and there’s so many fun things to do that it’s hard to stop and breathe. You’ve nailed the antidote: consistent positive communication. That has been lacking. I’m hoping to help fix that.

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No bylaws (we are not a separate legal entity, purely run as a school team), but we do have norms and standards outlined in our team handbook, leadership handbook, and mentor handbook. We place a large emphasis on our team mission statement and core values, relying on them to help set a positive and welcoming culture.

Our lead mentor role is the only paid coaching role, so it’s an officially recognized position by the school. She does an amazing job, but it’s not about being “the LEAD mentor” - it’s about getting stuff done. All of the mentors take on managing certain aspects of the team, and we work together to do what needs to be done. She takes care of the finances and school paperwork, in addition to working with our business subteam. I take care of most of our robot purchasing and interfacing with FIRST. We’ve both frequently said that we wouldn’t be able to run the team without each other, and the same is true for the other mentors who handle their areas of the team.

We’ve seldom had these. I think it’s largely driven by our culture and our core value of Compassion. When there has been issues, it comes down to a discussion between that student and mentors. For example, a student who was goofing off in the shop - we kicked her out for the night, and warned her that it’ll become permanent if it happens again, as it’s a serious safety issue. Two years later, she became our build lead, so I think that worked out well. We’ve also had students who didn’t live up to the leadership expectations for one reason or another. You do your best to coach them and help them improve, but in a couple of cases we’ve had to replace them for the sake of the team.

For student-student conflicts, we really haven’t had those. I can understand how students can be possessive about their designs, and have conflicts over the chosen design… we tend to get around that by asking the question “how are we going to make this decision” up front, before anyone tosses out any ideas. Everyone knows how the decision will be made, it’s almost always a democratic decision based on some form of quantitative analysis - walk them through how to determine which design would work better using numbers, instead of feelings or gut instinct. A great example of this just occurred a week ago. We’re working on a project with a 3D printed sprocket spinning a PVC pipe, and the question was do we use a set screw, or include a key in the printed piece, cutting a slot for it in the PVC pipe. There was some debate, with the general “feeling” among the students that the set screw, being steel, would hold up better than the printed key. So we did some destructive testing and found the opposite to be true (and had quite a bit of fun while doing so)!

We actually sell those types of decisions as mentor decisions with input. For example, every spring we have an application process for our captains and other leadership positions. After the captains are selected, the mentors meet with them to select the other leadership positions. Generally speaking, this ends up being the captain’s selecting the leaders (based on the applications), with mentors approving it, but technically speaking, it’s the captains recommending the leaders with mentors acting on that recommendation. We take the time to meet with all of the leadership hopefuls to help them understand what we’re looking for from them this year, how they can improve, and (if they didn’t get a position), what they might be able to do to still be a leader within the team.

This is true for drive team as well - we have a tryout process, where we try to collect as much quantitative data as possible (like timed trials driving the robot), then meet with the captains (assuming they are not trying out for drive team themselves - we do avoid that conflict of interest by excluding anyone who is trying out from the decision) to select the drive team. Ultimately, the buck stops with the mentors, and we try to make that clear with the students when we announce these sorts of decisions.

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We go by the rules of Thunderdome…2 go in 1 comes out. I kid!

Conflict will always be around. When you have a team with so many personalities…butting of heads is natural. This should be handled by the Faculty member on the team (if a school based team like ours).

  1. We have leaders for each area (code, build, business, and so on). We also have officers for the team and hold meetings. These are usually students that are veterans of the team. We do have elections…sort of. It is based on the recommendations of the Mentors. It is always based on a criteria that is best for the team…and some on seniority. ONLY caveat is drive team. That is decided on who is the best. Just because you drove last year…your title is not guaranteed.

  2. Mentors/Coaches. We currently have 3: Faculty Mentor/Coach (handles the students grades and any discipline issues). She is the end all be all with the students. Mentor/Coach 2 (me) who handles build, code, cad and pits and drive team. The last and CERTAINLY not least is a mentor that handles build and engineering issues. And we always meet seperately to make sure we are heading in the correct direction, and to express concerns. We do also have a business Mentor…and currently she is the President of the booster club.

  3. Lead Mentor/Coach handles this as she is faculty at the school. She also ensures that students are meeting the standards set by UIL. No pass…no play. And that includes even showing up to the meetings. IF a student is on the cusp of failing, and we haven’t hit that UIL check point or at the time the grades are due…students go to a different room to catch up.

  4. This is a black and white area. We all decide. Students come up with their best options and the reasons for them. There is some input from the Mentors…the sole decision is through the vote of the students on the design of subsystems. And they are ultimately responsible for making it work. We limit who is in the pits…10X10 and a bot and tools…and the drive team (who does repairs) we all have to step out to change our mind. And there is not enough room outside our pit. So, unless it is only one or two people…and they are just doing pit scouting…everyone is in the stands. UNLESS we have a drastic emergency (hasn’t happened yet).

The last point is…we all win together…we all fail together. Failure is always an option to quote the great Adam Savage. We go to events with the best that we can do. Is there disappointment? sure. It is emotional…even for me…you bet. The best one can do is not the best that someone else can do. It is when we can learn from the mistakes…that is the success we are looking for.

We were so use to losing…we didn’t know how to win. That changed 2 years ago. We have 1 blue banner, one finalist, both landed us to District Champs…not selected to finals…didn’t go to worlds both times. I would argue what to do to protect the kids from winning. IF they only know success…what happens if they fail? And in our case: if all we know is failure…what happens if we succeed? We have no clue if we have to be an Alliance captain…we weren’t prepared for it. And last year we were for alliance 5. Since I have been a Mentor…that was the first time. WE were unprepared. We didn’t know what to do. We never prepared for it. So, we were lost dazed and confused.

Preparing for success is just as important as for failure. Both are equally hard to handle…and both are fleeting.

I hope this rambling will help. Best of luck this year for you and your team!

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While I cant answer half of these questions, I can answer some.

While fortunately this has not been needed, we have a loose merit system on the team that basically just eliminates eligibility for a varsity letter, or bars someone from entering/doing certain things on the team until they prove they can handle themselves better. This solves most all student discipline issues that cant be solved by having one of our leadership members talking to that student.
Additionally, we have a position called the Team Development Coordinator. This person helps to mediate discussion between two or more students, as well as act as someone others can rely on if they have an issue in general. We have found this works pretty well.

Specifically for drive team, we try and have kids who don’t get a position as one of the main try-out positions (driver, operator) get some stick time as a backup team. Additionally we encourage them to try out next year. Specifically for girls, we also encourage them to try out for our girls drive team for girls competitions. Both these tend to get most disagreement resolved. If someone really has an issue with the decisions, we refer to a mentor. We are thankful to never have a large push back on the drive team decisions, so whether these work in practice is something to be found out.

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On one team I’ve mentored, no one was chomping at the bit to be the lead mentor. The teacher-mentor was by default for the first many years because she was the first mentor roped in and had designated herself as lead mentor when she originally registered the team. Eventually she wanted to step back and spend more time on other stuff, and convinced one of the other long-time mentors to do it. A couple years after that, all the original mentors were about ready to retire from the team, and passed the baton to an alum who had been mentoring for many years.

On another team, the team had its own 501(c)(3). The lead mentor for many years was the founding mentor (much like my previous team). When he eventually wanted to step back, there were two mentors who both wanted the lead mentor role, and the board of the 501(c)(3) voted on it.

We typically do not have student leaders make decisions that are likely to lead to backlash. We have student captains who lead various subteams and often are in a position to make technical decisions, but even those are heavily mediated by mentors who facilitate discussions and try to introduce relatively objective tools for making decisions (not perfectly objective, but better than “because I said so”). And the more controversial decisions like drive team, hotel room assignments, and selecting the student captains in the first place are made by the mentors - sometimes with student input from, say, the team president, drive coach, or previous year’s captains, but always with an adult making the final call and the student input never being made public.

Hi Heather,

These are great questions and it sounds like you and the team and the school are addressing very important issues right now. This is the 20th year since I started Angelbotics with one other teacher (long since retired) and we have made a lot of mistakes and learned a lot along the way. Bryce in particular did a great job in providing some answers, and Jon as well. I’ll add what I can in hopes that it is helpful.
Our bylaws are here, but they only outline a few key items and aren’t relevant to our day-to-day actions. More important is our Team Handbook which, like Bryce’s team, we extensively revised based on the 1678 handbook. You are welcome to borrow, steal or improve upon any of this.
Some key things that we added to our handbook and that impact our team:

  • We live off of our Motto: Robotics is a 4th Place Activity. We have very few issues with burnout from either mentors or students because we always put other things above this activity, specifically health, school, and responsibilities. I am the head coach and lead mentor but I am currently taking a week off to help my family with moving my stepson’s grandmother to Denver from Miami after a severe stroke. I model this behavior for the other mentors and for the students and as a result our culture has become increasingly healthy since we first insisted on this in 2019.
  • This also impacts the amount of time we spend in-shop. In 2018 I met Mike Corsetto of 1678 at the Utah Regional and as we talked I realized that his team meets much less frequently than mine did at the time; we were “try-harding”, meeting every weeknight, all day Saturday, and sometimes on Sundays. Mike’s team showed me that this was not only unneccessary but actually detrimental. I’ve asked many successful teams since then how much time they dedicate to being in the shop, and the numbers are surprisingly consistent, with 20-25 hours in build season being the range. Our current schedule for the coming game is currently looking like 17 hours, which is what we did for 2022 and 2023. It sounds like this may be an area of improvement for your team.
  • We have pretty strict expectations of all of our mentors, in terms of YPP compliance and then some. My biggest concern is that our program is the safest it can be for students and so our mentors have to meet these expectations (outlined in the Handbook).
  • Lead Mentors are the people who are willing and able to dedicate additional time to the team.
  • Student discipline and conflict procedures are outlined in the Handbook (again). We tend to utilize a Restorative Justice model for resolving conflict when possible, and have steps for dealing with issues like bullying or harrassment that go outside of that model, as I’m most concerned that the whole team be safe, and if a single student has issues which they can work on outside of our team environment I’ll move them in that direction quickly.
  • Our team is a collaborative effort between adults and students, and the student leadership group contributes to our decisions in an equal amount to the mentor group. We have two Captains, and two leads for each of our Sub-Teams (of which we have six), so 14 lead students. Obviously this depends on the size of a team. In the end, I as the Head Coach and LM1 am held accountable and responsible for decisions, and nothing the student leaders decide is something that I don’t back up. If someone is upset with how things go (such as drive team) then it’s me that takes the heat.

Glad that you are finding the current status to be a break. I hope that you are able to gain perspective and that when and if the team returns to action it is with joy rather than drudgery.

Mr.N

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There a lot of good answers in this thread, so I’d defer to them for the most part, especially as we have fairly minimal formal structure. We have an executive board with some mentors, parents, school representatives and sponsor representatives, and they are the decision makers of last resort, but most of our decisions are made by consensus.

I can’t recommend highly enough having a regular mentor dinner with no set agenda. Every Thursday our mentors get dinner after the meeting. Usually we talk robots, but sometimes we just hangout and talk about life or work. This gives us the space to discuss whatever is on our minds and it has proven to be a great way to discuss stuff in a relaxed setting and well before it becomes a problem. I’d also lets us hash things out with having to worry about students hear confidential information. I swear our dinner night has reduced mentor infighting from a constant war to almost nothing.

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This is a great idea!

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Super jealous of this, will definitely pitch it. I drive a carpool home, but maybe i can swing it.

Your experience is well supported by research. Teams that eat together perform better together:
https://doi.org/10.1080/08959285.2015.1021049

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How many mentors does your team have? We have about 20 for 48 registered students. In 2022 the team went from never having enough to suddenly having more than they knew what to do with. I was one of the new mentors (new to FIRST; I’m a retired physician) and we all had to self-organize. A lot of energy was spent figuring out whose job it was to do what–sometimes two or more people would be working on the same thing without knowing it. It is extraordinarily hard to get a group of 20 people out to dinner on a regular basis, but I really wish we’d tried harder!

To throw out one more sample point:

~30 students
~10 mentors
3 lead mentors
Build season is ~20 hrs/week, of which we ask students to pick the 80% which best aligns with their schedule.

Team handbook, effectively the bylaws that apply to students.

Leads are the ones willing to be leaders of leaders. They deal with the student discipline issues and logistics so that other leaders can focus on education or technical leadership.

Student leads are nominated by mentors, and elected by their peers (the opposite could work too). There’s buy-in from both sides.

Annual training goes over team expectations. To some extent, part of mature leadership is knowing that even if you make the perfect decision, some people will disagree with you and feel disappointed - this is something to build thick skin against. This is something I try to make sure my student leads are aware of, at least.

But, still - mentors are the backstop. Students should be allowed to explore and lead. But mentors should be the “safety net” that prevent one bad decision from sinking the whole team.

I’m rooting for ya - dealing with the hypothetically team issues you hypothetically describe is hypothetically difficult on multiple fronts - there’s the issues themselves that need dealt with, and the humans who have chosen not to deal with them yet. My advice is always to address the latter first - if they’re not (hypothetically) willing to start a process of transformation, your efforts may be spent better elsewhere.

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We have around 10 active mentors, with usually 5-8 at dinner on any given Thursday. The core of dinner group includes mentors in software, CAD, build, strategy, and admin, so even though we only occasionally have everyone, we can pretty much always get a good sense of whats happening and where opinions are leaning across the whole team. It’s also very easy to share the latest discussions with mentors and students who can’t make it to dinner and bring their insights to the next dinner meeting. It’s also worth noting that we don’t currently have any active mentors who are current team parents or who have young kids so we can go straight from the build space to the restaurant.

With 20 active mentors it certainly seems like it would be hard to have regular meals or other informal gatherings, but I would certainly try to do it at least a few times a year. A small group could have an impact on building consensus, or maybe you could try dividing up and have a technical team dinner and an administrative team dinner, or maybe it’s possible to set aside a chunk of time during regular meetings for mentors to hang out and chat with being distracted (if anyone figures this out tell me how). I’m not sure what would work, but it seems like anything that gets people talking without having specific agenda items to get through is a good thing.

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First off, accept this is hard. You’re in an environment that is, by design, not fair. That is designed to push you. You are not going to solve all the problems. You are not going to succeed. You are going to f*** up, hard sometimes. This is normal. (Mods, apologies, I reworded this a few times but none of it felt right.)

It sounds a lot like you blame yourself (and others) for failing students. You’re there day in and out doing the best you can in the situation. You’re reaching out to others to ask how you can do better. This isn’t failing. Take a breath.

  1. What kind of bylaws do other teams have? How do you structure your team?
  2. How does your team select its lead mentors? Are there teams that hold elections?

I wouldn’t start here. Obviously you need a minimum baseline set of rules to provide a safe environment. But let’s put a pin in org structures beyond that for a bit.

  1. How does your team handle student discipline issues? Student-student conflicts?

Ok, so this is one place where having a teacher around would be super handy. They are actually trained to help with this situation. But, for discipline - make sure it’s fair and proportional to the infraction.

As for reducing student/student conflicts - depends on what the conflict is about. In general, encourage them to actually listen to each other. I mean actually listen not just be spoken at. If they struggle with this, idk, do something silly like encourage them have to summarize the other side’s points or even pitch you on the other side’s argument. Encourage active listening. Encourage finding positive things in the other side. Very few ideas are entirely without merit (Pineapple on pizza and mecanum wheels are the common ones in FRC /s)

  1. If your team has student leaders who can make/influence decisions that affect their peers (e.g. drive team), how do you counsel or protect them from the inevitable backlash when kids are disappointed?

One of the ideas I’ve always had drilled into my head on leadership is that a good leader gives credit and takes blame. I apply this to mentors. If a student makes a decision that ends up blowing up a mentor (or several) need to be ultimately responsible. The student isn’t to blame. They are learning (we all are, but they are learning more). The mentors are adults and can deal with the backlash. Then the mentors can model the behavior of recognizing that in complex environments people cannot make the correct decisions all the time - you should strive to build systems that guide you towards correct decisions.

I want to reiterate that last sentence because I think it’s critical in your initial two questions. You need to build systems that help guide correct actions. How you communicate around this matters - if you think about it in terms of structure and control you’re going to get rigid structures and policies that probably don’t keep up with problems. You get blame and backlash rather than collaboration and empathy.

Instead of “who is in charge” ask “who is responsible”. Usually this is a responsible mentor and students with varying levels of responsibility based on their capability.

So, the second question - how do you select your leaders? You don’t. You let people choose to be responsible, they are not in charge. They are responsible to the team. Does this mean sometimes they make decisions about the piece they are responsible for? Yes. The team has empowered them to deliver a thing. I think this concept of empower owners not leaders is clear here.

The first question. Well, I’ve answered part of it, the structure is driven by the problems you face and the resources you have. As far as bylaws, again I think of it less as rules and more as aspirational goals. You work towards shared goals, if certain structures benefit those goals, keep em. If they don’t discard em. Evaluate and experiment to find what works for you.

Now, most of these sound simple but implementing them? It’s not so simple. We are all humans with emotional connectiosn to things. But as long as we all strive to keep in mind we’re working towards shared goals and recognize that different opinions aren’t more or less correct than your own (again, except pineapple on pizza and mecanum wheels) things usually can be worked out. It’s the whole empathy thing. This has been a lot of words to just get to that one…

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Just a few thoughts here. The first is that the essence of what our team aims to set as our conflict resolution culture is agreeing upon mutually shared goals. Once all parties have a shared goal, the conflict can be directed towards working together to achieve that goal, rather than two or more factions working against each other in counterproductive disputes.

The second thought is that part of learning to be a leader is learning to deal with the backlash. Kids are tough, they can handle some discomfort and in many cases become better prepared to lead through that experience. If students are making disrespectful or derogatory comments towards another students performance on the team, that is a different situation that would require mentor intervention.

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