i heard from a trustworthy source that a pair of green and black moe sticks have been taken hostage. the images below show that the danger the moe sticks are in is very real and the kidnappers are not playing around, but are in fact very serious. Although it cannot be confirmed, the word from my source is that the kidnappers want 300 million dollars in cash, or the moe sticks will be tortured and than executed.
Until our Stick Hostage Negotiator arrives, I think I’d like to talk to you about this. The feelings you are experiencing are perfectly normal. These sticks are quite possibly the most annoying things in the FIRST competition. But must you take your anger out in such a harsh manner? I think you would be endangering yourself as well as anyone around if you were to burn the sticks. As all the DuPonters know, “The Goal Is Zero.” The last thing we want is someone getting hurt. Those sticks have layers upon layers of paint which, when burned, would release incredibly dangerous fumes into the air. So please, we need to discus your ransom. $300,000,000 is a lot of money. Again, I’m not the official Stick Hostage Negotiator, but I don’t know if we will be able to afford you that amount of funds. Please, don’t lose contact. We only want to help you.
gasp…HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA…
good luck MOE
were do you guys come up with these things?
who is your negotiator anyways?
AH! Why would anyone do such a horrible thing? 
I managed to scrape up 10 cents from the back of my couch.
Who could have done such a horrible things as to kidnapp …MOE sticks???
I know I can say to whoever the owner of these sticks is that I know how you feel, because I had a pair taken the last night at nationals, we were on the alliance with the …MOE team, and we were given …MOE sticks because they are louder than our cow bells, which I know were annoying to other teams… But hey, they noticed us… ok, offtrack there… anyway, I say to the person that took the sticks, to stop, think about what they are doing, and free the sticks, they did nothing to you!!! think about the consequences before you do something you’ll regret!!!
FREE THE …MOE STICKS!!!
Just execute them. get it overwith.
SCT!
No!
(team joke)
/me shields alex forest’s eyes from the horrid site
oh the humanity, please whoever you are, do not destroy them. Think about what you are going to do. They are just sticks, and at that, only a year old! Did earplugs not help??? For one thing, your ransom will take ages to get together, so please for now maybe just let one go. That wouldn’t hurt would it? You know maybe you should just let both go. In the long run, that will be better for both of us. Godspeed MOE sticks.
BURN THEM…i mean…you cruel cruel person
tap-tap
tap-tap-tap
tap-tap
OH NO!
Burn them 1 at a time, until u get your ransom…
But save me 1, i will give u 10 buttons… 
Hi all!!!
It’s me…the StickNapper!!! HA HA HA!!!
It is true I have 2 MoeSticks in my posession and plan to execute them if I do not recieve my money. Whoever this “malcomp” is has his information wrong, I am not asking for $300 million…I am asking for $500 milllion and a Segway!!!
These sticks are quite possibly the most annoying things in the FIRST competition
Yes, that is why I sticknapped them in the first place.
I think you would be endangering yourself as well as anyone around if you were to burn the sticks. As all the DuPonters know, “The Goal Is Zero.” The last thing we want is someone getting hurt. Those sticks have layers upon layers of paint which, when burned, would release incredibly dangerous fumes into the air.
Very true. I do not plan to burn them, that was just to show how very serious I am. I personally perfer a more slow execution, belt sander style!!!
See you soon…
HA HA HA (evil laugh)
Forgot to attach the evidence that I am the true StickNapper.
Here is a picture of them with last Sunday’s newspaper.
OMIGOSH! PLEASE NO NOT THE… wait a minute those things gave me a migraine. Nevermind. Kill them.
hmm, maybe if we just got dean to come on down, i’m sure he could save them…
Ok, seeing as our Stick Hostage Negotiator decided to take a vacation this week, it looks like it’s up to me. We have nothing against you, team 25 – Raider Robotix. You have the attention you want, and I am prepared to negotiate. But first, a few questions. Why? At the PA Robot Challenge, the venue where the sticks were most likely taken hostage, our teams never met on the field. Further, we had a very limited number of team members present there – so the noise was not bad at all. In fact, I remember only one stick procession to the field. Please. Don’t lose contact. Keep talking, and more pictures with the sticks. We need to be sure of their state in order to continue this process.
sticknapper is goin down HAHHAHAAHAHAHA
I know sticknappers true identity and if he thinks he is going to get something out of my kidnapping, he is going down. i am gonna black mail you, you double crossing ****. I thought i could trust you to hold the hostages for now, but you now want to double cross me? think about what you are doin. keep the big picture in mind. dont screw this all up, we must stick (haha) togather fellow napper!!!
well said. If it really was PA Robot Challenge, I also can only think of one intant where the sticks may have been annoying. The best thing for you to do now is to stand down. The penalties are great for such a crime. I hope that in the near future we can come to a common ground where you, us, and the sticks can forget about this ordeal and live our lives in peace. You have tortured us enough stick baron, so please consider our offers. Please do not harm the sticks in any way, and tell the sticks to hang in there… To the hostage sticks…the other MOE sticks send their deepest regards and their gratitude for your service. Hang in their buddies!