THEY SAID it couldn’t happen. . .
THEY SAID it would never return. . .
THEY SAID it had run its course. . .
Hey doofus, pass the chili cheese fries and get me another beer.
After a brief hiatus as we burned through the INCREDIBLE, RIDICULOUS AMOUNT OF TV MONEY furnished to us by our star turn on the Discovery Channel, after SEVERAL MONTHS OF NOTHING BUT SHAMEFULLY SORDID ACTIVITY and nights out with the Cristal in the Escalade with some really attractive people, the humble inhabitants of the PTDR bunker are back to bring YOU:
THE POWER TOOL DRAG RACES!!
THAT’S RIGHT SPORTSFANS,
SUNDAY SUNDAY SUNDAY
Noon until we are done
At the ACE INTERNATIONAL SPEEDWAY
It’s the Power Tool Drag Races!
See Massive Milwaukees versus Devastating DeWalts! Porter Cable Drag Chutes on Sawzall chassis! Hardcore Black and Decker big-block action and inspired fits of Makita re-engineering! Junkyard hot dogs and cotton candy for the kids. OSHA-horrifying conditions in the pits for the kids over 18!
Yes friends, it’s
POWER TOOL DRAG RACES!
Come one, come all, ladies and gentlemen, children of all ages START YOUR MOTORS!!!
Yes we realize it’s short notice, but be COMFORTED in the fact that it will be TRIPLY IRRITATING for the EVENT’s ORGANIZERS!
AND REMEMBER: It’s Not Bad, It’s Punk Rock.
COMPLETE RULES for all your competitive needs can be found at
http://www.powertooldragraces.com. Check back for updates!
For information on how to register please hurl your abuse at Simone:
simone at qbox dot org
WE NEED VOLUNTEERS! Setup, Teardown, track tweaking, crowd control, junkyard “cleanup”, CAN’T HAPPEN WITHOUT YOUR HELP! Contact Simone for details.
All websites will be kept keenly abreast of any and all developing information!
Stretch your attention muscles and glue your finger to your refresh button!
Plot your revenge against those who have brought about your downfall in recent years!
Duck Tape the kids to the carseat!
Update your life insurance policies and guard yourself again your inevitable coronary embolism because
OH! MY! GOD! IT’S! THE! POWER! TOOL! DRAG! RACES!!!
Once again, details, ticket prices, rules, regs and other important stuff can all be found on http://www.powertooldragraces.com, assuming we’ve updated it in time. Which we probably will have but feel free to check back.
*I am not associated with the group hosting the event, but I’m definatly going to try to attend.